Surviving the Walkers
by AdeleTheBarnBum
Summary: It hit everywhere and it hit hard, people died and then rose again to feed on you regardless of if you were family or friend. It was a time when only the strong survived and Jem was strong, or so she like to think. Armed with her will to live and partnered with her loyal horse Hera, she sets out to defy the odds and stay alive, alone or at least that was the plan.
1. Chapter 1

*Hello, hello, hello everyone! I haven't published anything on here for many years but this one has been nagging at me and I just couldn't help it. I couldn't let 35 pages be wasted on just me, so I decided to share them with the wonderful people of FanFiction! Really this is just a silly idea that popped into my head and I just figured I throw it on FanFic, nothing serious here, and its raw. I didn't have a beta reader, although I have looked over it myself a few times, I apologize for any errors you might find, I can't catch them all. But anyway, I shall not keep you any longer, enjoy! Lots of love, AdeleTheBarnBum*

Alone, that was what I was in a sense. I mean, I wasn't alone but it wasn't a humane presence that was with me. Just me and Hera, like it's been for so long now and if it wasn't for her, well I would easily be dead. I stepped from the creeks refreshing cool water and slipped on my socks, it was so nice to get a little relief from the scorching sun, even just for a little. I slipped my feet into my worn dark brown leather boots; they were good, sturdy work boots that had served me so well all the way to now. I tucked my pants into them then stood, grabbing my shirt from where it was dripping dry on a tree branch. I slipped it over my head, enjoying the way the cool fabric clung to my warm skin, of course it wouldn't stay cool for long but I couldn't help that. I ran my fingers briskly through the sun bleached blond hair, then with quick fingers I secured it behind me in a tight braid.

"Well Hera, we should get moving on I guess," I said to the dun mare who was happily grazing at the lush long grass by the creek. She shook her head, giving a loud snort but I doubted it was meant for me, just chasing the flies off her most likely. I took a moment to stop and study the mare, her thick, strong legs, lean well-muscled body, and perfect broad Quarter Horse face with her kind eyes. She gave another shake of her head, sending her red tipped, black mane soaring for a moment. Maybe if we weren't in this hole I could have been able to do so much more with her, she had such pure Quarter Horse lines and the ancient and prized dun color. She was the perfect example her wild dun ancestors, with her black tipped ears, the cob webbing on her face, her shoulder stripes, leg stripes, dorsal stripe, and the frosting at the dock of her tail. She was so perfect, so sound, never a problem.

She was completely unbound, no ropes, no halter, no nothing and yet she stayed. I didn't think I would ever understand that exactly. I mean, I loved her more than anything but I just never had imagined that I would ever be so lucky as to have her express such friendship and trust to me that she would stay with me. I was honored; I was beyond honored that she would do such a thing.

"Alright girl, let's try to cover some ground before the sun gets at its worst." I said to her and picked up my things from the ground. She slowly walked over and I held out my hand to her, she lipped at it wistfully, I had given her my last mint so long ago but she was still hopeful. I gave her forehead a gentle scratch for a moment before I started to get her saddled up. Saddle pad then the light western saddle, good for long distance travel in hot weather too. I attached my saddle bags, stuffed with clothes, a little food, and other supplies then tied my little sleeping back behind the saddle. I made sure the girth was tight and then slipped her bridle on, talking to her the whole time with my usual pointless chatter, used mostly to fill the silence for me more than her.

Feeling satisfied she was ready I scanned my little camp site one last time before hoping up into the saddle, she took a step forward in anticipation but I held her back at the sound of a stick breaking not far away. We waited, still as stone, listening to the sound growing closer, my heart raced and Hera feeling my excitement could hardly keep still.

"Not much longer," I whispered as the sound was moments away from revealing itself and I took a deep breath to calm myself. The branched parted suddenly and in stumbled a walker, as I heard it called once. It started at me with its cloudy, stupid eyes and then growled hungrily, driven primarily by animal-like instincts. My hand jumped to the butt of my hand gun in its holster on my hip but it wouldn't be worth it. Not to risk drawing the attention of other walkers or wasting a bullet, I could easily hit it with my bow too but that was still a waste because I didn't feel like retrieving the arrow.

"You're lucky you filthy scum," I spat in its direction before urging Hera forward and leaving the moaning, stumbling creature attempting a pathetic pursuit in our dust. As we raced from the forest, back to the road we were on the day before I got thinking. The rhythmic sound of her hooves thudding on the dirt and powerful surging of her body took me to a happy place, the last of my happy places. Hera was the only thing that brought me joy anymore; it all had been taken away from me, from the world. I tried not to think about it much, about losing my family and friends, about the world going crazy and now, only the strong were surviving. They were fewer out in the woods, the cities were where they mostly were, the more heavily populated areas which is why Hera and I were going this way, less people, less of the walkers. But they still came and could still kill, you couldn't take anything for granted, because in packs they were just about unstoppable and alone, your best bet is escaping.

It only broke out a little ago, although after so long by myself, striving to survive it was almost impossible to keep track of what time it was, but it hadn't started too long ago. People got sick, they died, and then they came back. A bite or scratch from one would send you into a horrible fever which always ended in the death of that person and then, the resurrection of that person. And only one thing could kill them, a wound to the head, bullet, arrow, stone, as long as you could damage their brain you could kill it. It was hard, very hard for many but you had to stay strong, I stayed strong and here I was. I didn't know what the point was, word was there was no cure, the refuge centers were all overrun, there was no point and yet, I pushed on.

As we reached the road I let Hera slow to a walk to let her catch her breath, at least I still had her, my companion and best friend, she kept me going. It was still early morning, the sun only rising maybe half an hour ago but that sun was pretty hot, thankfully we were past the worst of summer, it was soon time for fall to come around. I could see it was growing close in how the nights were getting cooler and cooler, which was a relief from the heat of day. I wondered how a winter like this would go, I would have to make sure we stayed warm and dry, I half hoped it would be a mild winter.

Every now and then I would run into others like me, still striving to stay alive. Sometimes they were friendly and would give me shelter for a night, other times I was lucky to escape with my life. This, it changed people, for some it made them stronger and for others it brought out their inner animal, fighting only for themselves, willing to cut down anyone else who might interfere.

I liked to follow the back roads as I went, so that I could open pasture gates and freeing the poor animals that might be trapped inside, give them a fighting chance if they would take it, or if they weren't already dead. Not all that long ago we came across a field full of horses, they ran around in their small enclosure and I wondered how they had survived so long, the grass was down to the dirt and their water buckets empty. At the sight of me they began to panic, running faster and kicking up. I quickly jumped from Hera and opened up the pasture gate then ran back to my horse. It took them a little to see it was open but it took but a second for them to charge through once they did see it. I wandered around the property looking to see if there might be more but they were all the animals left. I checked the barn first, grabbing the supplies I might need, along with a bale of hay which I let Hera munch at while I searched. The hay was a treat she happily accepted, chewing quickly and I could just imagine her smiling at me.

Next was the house, sometimes I would find things in houses that I could use and other times I would find things I wished I could forget, I always felt nervous going in. I left my gun in my holster at my hip hoping I wouldn't need to use it because it was sound that attracted the walkers and if there was a herd around and if I shot my gun, I just might be done for. I put my hand on the hilt of my large hunting knife in its sheath hanging from my belt; that I could use silently. From Hera's saddle I pulled down my bow and arrows; it was also silent and good at long range, although I had limited arrows and I would need to get them back.

Notching an arrow on the string, I slowly stepped up the porch steps and kicked the door open. The crash was loud enough to alert anyone in the house to my presence, which could be good or bad. But since no one came running I decided it must be empty or they could possibly just be hiding but I cleared my mind and focused on the task ahead. I crept from room to room, it was an older house and the furniture was older as well but that's about all I was seeing. The back door stood open and leaves had already blown down the hall, gathering at the sides. I slipped into the kitchen, pushing open the swinging door with my foot and leading with my arrow. It was empty, it looked messy, like someone had rushed through and grabbed a few things, it made me wonder where the owners of the house had gone but it also gave me an idea that there were no humans here. The whole downstairs was empty so that left the upstairs.

A couple times the floor creaked under my feet but other than that it was the only sounds I heard. I found the upstairs much like the downstairs, closet doors stood open; drawers were pulled out and spilled onto the ground, valuables gone. They hadn't had much time to pack and that could be the difference between life and death, I knew that. So I started my search, I found a few shirts that would fit, some warmer clothing for when it got cold, I stole a bed sheet and from the bathroom I took tooth paste and soap. That would come in handy when I would stop and bathe in creeks. I started to leave the last bedroom when I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, something I didn't do much anymore.

I stared long and hard at the person who looked back at me, her straggly blond hair was crudely tied back in a braid, blue eyes were hard, bags hung under them, and her frown told of her troubles. A bow in her hand, knife and gun at her hips, her sleeveless shirt revealed strong, muscular arms, but it was her eyes, my eyes, that I couldn't stop staring at. They were so... I couldn't explain it and I had to look away. I took a deep breath to bring myself back and then trudged down the steps to drop the goods off at the porch then back in for the kitchen. I still brought my bow, it helped me feel more secure even if I looked through the house and found it empty. I was able to retrieve a couple canned goods that were still okay, there wasn't much but it was enough.

I was just about to leave when I heard a thud; I froze and spun to see where it came from. It seemed to be under the floor, down in the cellar, I slowly walked over, rolling my feet so I made no sound at all. There sat a closed door which must have led to the basement, I grabbed the doorknob and turned it slowly only to find it locked. But there, it came again and I pressed my ear to the side of the door. I could hear them then, shuffling around in the basement, groaning softly every now and then, I couldn't tell how many though and if I alerted them to my presence up here who knew if the door would hold. So as quietly as I could I started to back away from the door, focused so much on getting away silently I missed the sounds from behind until I got closer and heard the heavy breathing over my shoulder.

It was all a blur as I flew around, seeing a walker staring me down from the front door, he gave an excited groan and then jumped forward but I was too fast for him. My arrow protruded from his forehead in a matter of seconds and down he went with a thud, a loud thud. I heard them climbing the stairs, aware of me up here now and I cursed myself for being so stupid. I jerked the arrow from the walker and jumped over him, knowing I had little time I scooped up my things and called for Hera. She had run off a little, scared by the walker no doubt but at the sight of me she came trotting over. Moving quick I filled her bags with the things I gathered, glad it hadn't been a complete waste coming here.

I could hear them scratching at the door behind me and I could also hear the groaning of the wood, it was an old house, who knew how long that door could hold. As a crack sharply sounded, I knew the door wouldn't be holding them much longer, I fixed the last strap on the saddle bag and graceful as a cat I was on her back ready to ride. Only then did I notice the small bay horse next to her, he rolled his eyes at me, snorting wearily but didn't flee, he seemed to take a liking to my mare, I might have found that amusing then if I hadn't heard the door give way and the hungry cries of the dead. I nudged Hera with my heels and that was all she needed, we took off quickly, leaving the house and its walkers behind, and I was grateful to be moving on.

The little bay stuck with us for quite a while, following along, resting with Hera but he just wouldn't trust me. It made me wonder about the poor horses past but I didn't let it get to me. He would probably still be with me now if it hadn't been for the herd we met. The silly little horse got so spooked by them his blind panic ran him right away from Hera's side and I never saw the little guy after that. I hoped he had made it to a nice green pasture; I made myself believe that, I didn't want to think about the alternative.

The worst of the days heat had finally passed and the sun was started on its downward decent when I slip from Hera's back to give her a break. She was a very hardy horse, used to work; I made sure of that when training her, but every horse could only take so much. I slipped out of my sweaty jeans and enjoyed the feeling of my legs complete freedom before pulling a pair of shorts from my bag and pulled them on. I swapped my boots for a pair of light trainers and then started to jog. I did this at least once a day, it got me off her back, gave me something to focus on, and it was good for me to stay in shape, in case I ever had to outrun some walkers. I looked to my watch, I had no idea if the time was right but the date, I knew that was wrong, it wasn't the 15th of December that I knew. Apart from that flaw I could still time myself, I had slowly built up to running for a full two hours, I didn't know how many miles that was but it didn't really matter, just an hour of running, even at an even paced jog would be enough to lose a walker and that's all that mattered.

A few hours before sunset I started to scout for a place to spend the night, it was pretty hard for me, being alone to have a good night's sleep. I had no one to take watch for me and well Hera didn't know to wake me if she heard something, usually I was pretty happy finding us some place I could lock us in for the night, like a barn or small, empty house, preferably a barn. And tonight it looked like I was going to get lucky, because I spotted a building ahead, close to the road and what looked like a small barn. That would be just right for tonight.

Thankfully it was empty; I barred up the doors and removed Hera's tack before eating a can of interesting tasting baked beans. I took a little look around the barn but there really wasn't much there, expect an ax, it might come in handy. Not long later I was snuggling down for some well needed shut eye, I was glad for this shelter because now I could actually get a decent night's sleep. Falling asleep was always the hardest thing to do; the memories always attacked then, things I didn't want to remember, people and places, times before now, happiness… All things I would never have again. I focused on the shuffling of Hera's hooves in the straw, the sound of her quiet breath, and the thought of her calmed me enough that sleep took me.

*So if you liked it tell me. Please. I would love you forever if you would! And if you didn't like it tell me. Please. Constructive criticism is good but don't be mean. And if you can't wait for the next chapter, bug me, I wouldn't mind in the slightest. Thanks for reading :)*


	2. Chapter 2

(Well it took me longer than I wanted to get the second chapter out but here it is. I've been stressed and brain dead with these college applications and SAT studying, bleh. But I got this chapter out and I am happy! So read away! P.s. I am sorry if there are any errors, I don't have a beta but I did read of this a few extra times to make sure it was good, so I hope I got all of the mistakes. )

A week more we carried on this way, releasing penned in creatures along the road, searching for supplies, running, moving, always moving. Struggling through restless, nightmare filled nights, I was growing weary of this life. But then there was Hera, she gave me a reason to keep going, something to live for, someone who loved me. But I was still slowly dying inside, I found myself taking my pain out on whatever walker I got my hands on, one shot just wasn't enough, I beat them mercilessly just to make myself feel better, but it didn't work, how could it?

We wandered, no longer on the road, we had lost it a while back thanks to some walkers, they were dead now of course but I just didn't feel like looking for the road anymore, what was the point? And anyway, maybe out in the woods we wouldn't find so many walkers here. Suddenly I heard a gunshot, it had to be another person, as far as I knew walkers didn't have the brains to shoot a gun, let alone pick on up. Or at least I hope they couldn't learn to do that. Another gunshot echoed through the forest, whoever it was could possibly need help. I mean why else would they be shooting like that? Everyone knows sound draws more walkers in. Even in every man for himself time I wouldn't stand by when someone needed my help. And anyway, I would give me a reason to bash in some more walker heads.

I urged Hera forward and we sped toward the sound, I could hear the groans of the dead as I grew closer and it sounded like pretty many. I could see through the trees now, there were at least a dozen walkers against what looked to be four guys. So it wasn't the best odds.

I pushed Hera to go faster and pulled the ax from where I had made a little hook for it on the saddle, I held it level with the walkers' heads and we tore past, lopping off four as we went. In one fluid movement I slipped the ax back into its loop and had my bow in my hand, an arrow flying into the head of a walker. Five down for me and it looked like seven to go. I caught a glimpse of the guys but it seemed that they were getting over their shock at my appearance and had started fighting again. Two more down, another arrow flew from my bow and I saw the red feathers of an arrow fly past to lodge into the head of a walker a few steps behind me. I looked up and saw one of the men carried a crossbow, at least he knew how to use it. That meant there were only four left and within a few moments a large black man took two down and a tall, lean man whacked one in the back of the head with the hilt of his gun. As the guy with the crossbow finished off that one, the tall man shoved a knife into the last's eye.

I let my bow rest on my thighs as the men recovered and then looked up to me, which was one of the pros of having a horse. Hera stood like a rock, she was such a good girl, at close quarters she would even kick and paw at the walkers, her ears pinned, hate and fear clear in her eyes. I spotted a deer back on the ground behind them and figured that's what brought about the commotion.

"Who are you?" The tall man asked, he seemed to be the leader, the black man and an Asian man I hadn't noticed positioned themselves behind him but the man with the bow moved off to collect his arrows.

"You're welcome," I smartly responded, but I hadn't really expected a warm welcome, hardly anyone handed out those anymore. And I had Hera, if things started to go sour here, I had the high ground, as well as a bow in one hand and an arrow ready in the other, I couldn't forget the gun at my hip either. Of course, if it came down to it, I would much rather run than fight but if they hurt or threatened Hera, there was no telling what I would do.

"Who are you, where did you come from, and what do you want?" The leader drilled me with the questions and his companions looked on curiously. With a yank the man with the bow removed one of my arrows from a walker's skull.

"That would be mine thank you," I warned him, making him looked up and scowl but he dropped the arrow. "I am Jem and this is Hera," I started as I saw the tall man open his mouth to demand answers or maybe try to intimidate me. "I came from nowhere and I'm headed to nowhere, what I want, well that is a very good question." I knew my answer might sound sarcastic but it was the truth. Slowly the man with the bow walked over to the side of the leader, his blue eyes flicked up to me with a look of distaste maybe.

"I see," he seemed to mull it over, glancing down for a moment before turning his bright, clear blue sky eyes up at me. He ran his hand over his dark, wavy hair and I saw the muscles in his jaw pop.

"So if you're allowed to interrogate me, can I demand you of your names?" I was being smart, I was just asking for them to turn on me, I knew it but I couldn't help it. That seemed to catch him off guard and he pursed his lips thoughtfully.

"Well first off, thank you for your help," he started and maybe it was because the adrenalin from the fight was leaving he was able to think clearer, he was less on the offense now. I gave a nod but kept quiet. "I'm Rick, this is Glenn, T-Dog, and Daryl." He introduced the Asian, the black man, and then the man with the bow. "So you're just passing through then? Are you with anyone?" He asked.

"I'm alone, that's how it's been since the beginning." I stated flatly and I could tell they were sizing me up again, trying to understand how I had made it on my own so long. "And sure, I guess I'm passing through. Like I said, I don't have anywhere I'm planning to go, we are just going." They appeared to think about that a moment while Daryl worked at cleaning off his arrows.

"Alone you say? How have you managed to survive so long on your own?" He questioned but I knew what he was getting at.

"What, you mean since I'm a girl, how'd I make it so long?" I smartly replied. "I know how to take care of myself." I growled.

"That's not what I meant," he waved his hands as if he were erasing the words from in front of him. "It's just, that's impressive, I didn't… Not many could claim such a feat." He tried to fix his mistake but I kept my lips pressed into a firm line. Glenn seemed uncomfortable with the conversation, T-Dog kept scanning the area for walkers, and Daryl, he watched, his arms crossed with an almost amused look on his face. "Would you want to join us for a meal?" Rick asked, catching me off guard, I hadn't expected that but I saw the deer and the thought made my stomach rumble.

"I guess I could," I shrugged. I slipped off Hera then and as they watched, recovered all my arrows, wiping them off on my pants quickly before returning them to their home.

"So… a horse?" Rick said, finally touching the topic I knew everyone was wondering about. I patted my mare's neck and she turned her head to nuzzle my hand.

"She was my partner long before all this, I couldn't just leave her, and it's not like I had anyone else." I stated. "She holds her own too." I added a bit defensively.

"I see," Rick said, but I doubted he really understood. We started to walk, T-Dog grabbed two of the deer's legs and Rick reached down to grab the other two.

"Hera can carry that for you." I suggested and they all looked at me with confusion. "The horse," I enlightened them.

"Oh, she would?" Rick hesitated.

"I trained her myself, I should know."

"Thank you," they didn't seem to sure how to respond to my gesture but they gently draped the deer across my horses back, probably waiting for her to bolt but she stood just like I knew she would.

"Just don't get any blood on my saddle or I'll use your hide to replace it," I threatened halfheartedly but I was pretty serious about the blood. They looked at me with alarm until I cracked a half smile and then they relaxed. We started walking again, Hera following her head at my shoulder, I held nothing yet my horse acted like a big dog. I walked behind Rick, Glenn, and T-Dog and hanging behind was Daryl, I could feel his eyes burning holes in my back. I had a feeling he was the one I was going to watch out for; I felt the tension between us already.

When we made it to their camp six people were waiting, they had camp set up and a small fire in anticipation of the guys returning with meat. They all seemed pretty surprised to see me and Hera, but they kept back as they got the deer from her back and four women took the deer to begin dinner. A young boy stepped up to Rick and I took it that he was his son, they looked so much alike, sharing the same bright blue eyes.

"We heard shots," he stated and the women paused, so that they could hear too. A tall, elderly man walked over and seated himself by the low fire, he looked weary.

"Some walkers found us, but we got them, and Jem here helped. But we will wait until dinner is ready, then we will talk."

I moved away from them, Hera close behind me and looked for a good spot to settle her in. Their camp was small, they had their vehicles parked around for some protection and tents had been set up close together. I found a spot away from their things and I shed her of her tack, taking a moment to rub her down, spending most of the time on the sweat spots. When I was satisfied I stepped back to let her know she was free. She took a few steps before she sunk down to the ground and rolled, grunting and joyfully squirming in the grass. I couldn't help but smile then turned back to the group to see them all watching me, probably very curious about the girl who just mysteriously appeared from the woods.

It wasn't long before the meal was ready and we sat before the fire. I found myself next to Maggie, who seemed to be Glenn's girl, and to my left was Rick.

"You have a mighty fine horse," Maggie said to me as we sat. I looked at her with pure surprise for a moment; never had I thought I'd hear that, I didn't know anyone else cared anymore. "I had my own back home, but we were hit by a herd pretty bad, we had to leave them behind." She clarified.

"I'm truly sorry about that," I said to her and my heart broke, I couldn't even begin to imagine having to leave Hera behind.

"But I'm serious, she is a gorgeous horse," she smiled at me and I couldn't help but give a little smile back. The meal was nice, deer meat with some wild carrots they managed to find, it was the best meal I've had in some time. After the meal Rick started his tale. They got the deer and were about to start home when the herd hit, they weren't sure what to do, there were so many of the walkers and so few of them. They fought and fought and hoped it wasn't too many.

"Then Jem came galloping in, she pulled an ax out and took down four walkers with one pass, then one more with her bow. And she did it faster than I had time to think about how we would get ourselves out of this mess. I guess I can understand how you survived on your own," the way he said it was playful and I knew I wouldn't hold what he hadn't meant to say against him. "But she defiantly made our victory a little easier to reach," he said and I was quite glad for the change of attitude since we first met. Well a change in all but one, he had stood on the other side of the fire the whole time just staring me down, and there was something in that, that irked me. Well something most likely being the way he was acting, like he didn't trust me or something, well I didn't trust him.

"Well thank you Jem," Lori said, she was Rick's wife, tall and lean as well, with curling dark brown hair and large brown eyes. She looked to be a very strong woman and well, I guess one had to be to be with Rick. Maybe that sounded mean but he seemed like a very hard man. "We would like to invite you to stay the night with us, if you'd like." She offered and I gladly accepted.

"Thank you, I was starting to wonder if I'd be able to find a place to hunker down for the night. Especially since I'm sure your gun stirred up some walkers out there." I pointed out. "I can help with night watch if you want me too."

"No, don't you worry, you just sleep. You look like you haven't seen a good night's sleep in a good while," Rick said. Had it been so obvious? I couldn't help but worry on it for a second but then shrugged it off, oh well.

"I appreciate it," I said. "Tomorrow morning, as soon as the sun is up, I'll be out of your hair," I stood, going to check Hera before calling it a night.

(So if you liked it please review, I like reviews! I really want to know what you (my readers) are thinking, how it made you feel, if you like it, ext. So make my day and leave me a comment. Seriously after I post something I check every hour just about to see if I got any reviews... Pathetic I know but it just goes to show how much I love them. So thanks for reading, keep an eye out for chapter 3!)


	3. Chapter 3

(Here she be, chapter 3. Hehe, I rhymed. So I just have to toot my own horn here a little but I think this is coming along very well! Yes it is already written and really I am just going back and tweaking it here and there and checking for errors and such. I am really sorry if I do miss anything though! But I am very proud of this one! Oh and this is set after season 2 abouts, after they get run off the farm by the walker herd. Sorry if stuff doesn't really match up and seasons and whatever, I am trying but it isn't easy. So thanks for reading, I will stall you no more so here is chapter 3!)

Early that morning I was up, packing my things into my bags, ready to get moving, they were nice but I didn't want to overstay my welcome. I was used to being alone, I was better off that way, I could say what I wanted, do what I wanted. I didn't have to take orders from anyone, just me and Hera, the two amigos, three was a crowd anyway, right? I lifted up my saddle when I spotted him coming over to me, I stopped and Rick stood in front of me, his thumbs hooked behind his belt buckle. He hesitated for a moment, like he was working to say something. I got ready for the goodbye, this was how it was, what more could I expect?

"You, you're welcome to stay with us, you don't have to go it alone anymore." Now this, this was the biggest shock of them all. I felt my jaw drop and the saddle I held slipped from my fingers slowly.

"You mean it? I mean-no, I wouldn't want to… to intrude on your group." I tightened my grip on the saddle again, thinking that was that but it shouldn't have bothered, he had heard the excitement in my voice, he saw the way my eyes lit up.

"We talked it over last night, it was unanimous, you're good with a weapon, you seem to be a hardworking, and when we are past introductions, you are a nice girl." He gently teased and I felt my heart swell.

"But really, I couldn't…" I tried to be firm with myself.

"I insist." He pushed.

"I… I don't know what to say…. Thank you," I meant it.

"Don't thank me; you'll be a welcome addition to the group."

At first fitting in wasn't easy, woman's work, that was something I didn't do very well, never had, probably never will. Cooking was impossible for me, fetching wood was a boring, I got antsy and agitated just sitting around doing laundry, and the only time I could really force myself to sit still was when I had watch. I just felt like I contributed so little to the group, I wanted to do more than little chores. It didn't take them too long to figure out how useless I was at camp and I found myself with the men. Scouting, hunting, more difficult work, finally I felt like I contributed. Hera was enjoying her time off too, although I wondered how it would go when it was time to move on but I decided not to think about that now.

One night as we sat around the fire, idle talk was drifting around; we were just about to get to sleep but didn't want to leave the warm fire just yet. For a long time the cracking and popping of the fire was all that filled our ears. The cool night made us huddle deeper into our jackets and it nipped at our noses and cheeks.

"So Jem," Hershel piped up. "What's your story, if you don't mind my asking?" All ears were trained on me, waiting for my answer.

"I guess I knew this question was coming," I half joked but I paused, thinking hard. Did I really want to tell them? "But sure, I'll tell, if I only have to once." I decided and they got comfortable, their faces grew somber, it was obvious this would be no good story. "I guess in a way I'm one of the luckier ones," I started. "I mean, I wouldn't say I'm lucky, just that, at least my mom was long dead before the outbreak. I didn't have to worry and wonder about her. Not that I really worried about my father… My mother was taken by cancer when I was a little girl, it was hard but maybe better in the long run." I paused to stir the dirt under my boot for a moment, not sure how to go own. I had never really told anyone about my past like this, especially not people I didn't know, but things were different now, what did it matter?

"And your father?" Maggie gently asked.

"After my mom died, and my brother and I were left alone with him, things got worse. I mean, he could be a jerk before but her death turned him into a monster… The moment I could I got out and then it was just me and my brother for a while. But we grew up, went our own ways, did better for ourselves. It's funny, I raised him, so isn't it fitting that I ended up putting a bullet in his head." I said it with dry humor and they looked at me, eyes wide and full of sadness and pity. "Now before you go thinking I'm heartless it was what he wanted, he told me to. He got bit and when the fever attacked, which we knew brought death then resurrection, he begged me to end it before he could come back. He said he wanted to die knowing who he was, not as a mindless beast. It was the hardest thing I've done but I don't regret it. After that I left with my dog, got Hera, gathered the things I would need, and set out on my own. Not a week in they ate my dog, the bastards." It was another somber joke but I saw a few half smiles. "And well she and I have been wandering ever since." I finished and I could see the looks of misery as they relieved their own experiences as they sympathized with me.

"Thank you Jem," Hershel's soft voice reached out to me across the fire and I dipped my head in acknowledgment. And I would stick to what I said, I wasn't going to tell it again, already I could feel the nightmares growing. It would be a restless night.

When it came to hunting Daryl was the man, he was a great tracker but we found I was actually a bit better with a bow than him. Having a crossbow he was slower than I was, although maybe he could be more accurate but as far as accuracy went we were pretty close. It was just that I could reload much faster and a couple times beat him to the shot. Whether it was a walker, or dinner, I didn't try to but sometimes I couldn't help but get to it first. Even if I did notice him getting ready for the kill, I just couldn't stop myself. Which was stupid on my part, I knew it rubbed him the wrong way. He did a good job of hiding his anger from the others but I saw it and he knew it. I really wasn't trying to show him up but I won't deny that I enjoyed it a little, his murderous glares conferment that I was doing a wonderful job of pissing him off. Maybe I wanted to get back at him for the cold and haughty way that he could treat me, could you blame me? Things were tense though, it was an explosion just waiting to happen, we both had very short fuses and that was obvious. It was only a matter of time. Rick seemed to do his best to keep us apart, he was an extraordinary leader, a little hardened yes, there was something going on between him and his wife too, they seemed to be in an argument. But that was none of my business and I would keep my nose out of it.

But Daryl, he was an interesting man, hard to read yet pretty easy to figure out. He was a hick, or redneck, however you want to put it. Just about every shirt he owned was a button down with the sleeves ripped off to show off his muscular arms, his hair was a mess, and I couldn't help but wonder how often he bathed. He had small bright blue eyes which were usually squinted; he sported a sandy colored mustache, and beard that seemed to be based mostly on his chin. Basically he never went anywhere without his crossbow and was always on the defense. As far as his personality, he was pretty interesting to try to wrap my brain around, he was very easy to offend and seemed to rather be alone then with the group yet it was obvious he had a soft spot for Carol and respected Rick very much. He was loyal but unpredictable, annoying but also pretty smart, for a hick. I considered myself a very observant person but Daryl, he definitely gave me a challenge, I liked a good challenge.

Our camp was stationed with our backs to a hill, which was more of a wall it was so steep. It offered pretty good cover while we tried to figure out what to do next. No more than a stone's throw away a gently gurgling creek ran past, which was good for water and cleaning clothes. Overhead we had tall and broad trees that gave us nice shade and a pretty decent roof when it rained. It wasn't a half bad spot to call home, at least for a little while anyway. One morning we stood out by the fire, discussing our situation. We knew we had to move it was only a matter of time before we were attacked again, but what would we do?

"We can't really drive anywhere since we are out of gas and I don't want one car going anywhere without everyone, what happens if that one breaks down as well? We can't have that." We all nodded in agreement with what Rick was saying and a moment of silence fell on us.

"I could always ride out and see what I can find, that would be an easy trip for Hera and I." I suggested.

"No, you couldn't, you are a part of this group now, no one goes alone. We can't risk it." I didn't know whether to take offence to that or feel good, I knew I could do it but I was part of the group now and to know that he wouldn't want to risk me, it was nice to hear.

"I say let her go, anyway we'd be better off without the crazy bitch," I heard Daryl speak up and everyone looked to him in alarm.

"What did you just call me?" My voice was low, my heart beat furiously in my chest and I felt my face redden a little from anger.

"You heard me… bitch," Daryl hissed mockingly, wearing an ugly scowl.

"Daryl," Rick said sharply but I doubted he heard him, I hardly registered that Rick said anything. Our eyes were locked and I glared deep into his, letting him see my anger clearly. His eyes danced and I could see he was loving this confrontation. Really I wasn't a confrontational person but if he was going to push my buttons I would fight back.

"Call me that one more time, I dare you," I growled, low and threatening. If he wanted to be a pig, fine, but it would have consequences.

"Daryl don't do this," Rick warned but it wasn't enough, there was no stopping him. A little smirk pulled at his lips and a playful light entered his eyes.

"Bitch," he sounded it out nice a slow but before he even got the last of the word out of his mouth my fist cracked him right in the jaw. Pain exploded from my knuckles but I hardly felt it I was so furious with him. He reeled back a step, cupping his cheek with his hand, he looked at me with blue eyes wide and I heard a gasp from someone.

"Don't say I didn't warn you," I glared at him a moment more before relaxing my offensive body language. He stared at me with complete and utter shock, unbridled and obvious; I had given him a good surprise. "And if you ever call me a bitch again I'll break your jaw." I added and he straightened, he released his cheek and opened his mouth wide, stretching it out but I saw it, the respect was clear in his eyes. I didn't think we would have too big of problems between the two of us, the worst was gone, but I knew we would probably never see eye to eye.

The others stood watching, mouths agape in speechless in bewilderment, I don't know what they had expected but it wasn't that. I'm sure they expected Daryl to freak, a little part of me thought he would as well, but he didn't. All that was, was me showing him that I wasn't someone he could push around easily and I think in a little way I might have even impressed him.

"That's some right hook," he finally said and I cracked a half smile, the others visibly relaxed and I had a feeling all my thoughts were right.

"Yeah, so you best not get on my bad side again." It was a lighthearted threat but a threat none the less and he knew it.

"Damn," he groaned stretched out his cheek again. "I'll remember that."

"I can't believe you did that," Maggie exclaimed when she found me a little later, lightheartedly grooming Hera. She grabbed one of my brushes and got started on Hera's other side. Since I came we easily became close because of our affection toward horses. "I mean, I don't think anyone would dare to that to Daryl. That… You have guts." She babbled.

"That felt so good," I laughed and she shook her head.

"You are crazy Jem, just crazy." Since we had become friends she filled me in on the things that lead them to meet up. You see Hershel the father of Maggie and Beth; the rest of their family was dead now. They met Rick when he staggered onto their property after his son Carl had been shot by a friend of theirs' who was now dead as well. Rick and their group had been lead to that area while on search for Carol's missing daughter who they eventually found out had been bitten and became a walker, the poor little girl. It was interesting to hear that it was Daryl who was dead set in finding the little girl, it made me wonder why and it also showed that he made another soft spot. He wasn't quite as tough as he wanted to seem.

She told me about how her father had been adamant in a cure and kept their family and friends who were walkers locked up in the barn. Eventually Rick's group found out and well, it wasn't long before all the walkers in the barn were dead. Then an evil plot by Shane, who had been part leader of the group before and Rick's long time best friend, he devised up a plan to get Rick alone and murder him without being caught. The reason Shane wanted to do that was because he still loved Lori, he wanted to be completely in charge, and Rick stood in his way. But Rick managed to kill him first, so that's how that went down. Moments after that a huge walker swarm hit the farm and they were driven from Hershel's property, bringing them here. Oh and Lori was pregnant, couldn't forget that. They certainly hadn't had it easy and I'm sure that wasn't all the adventures they had. But with all that went down with Rick, Shane, and Lori it wasn't much of a surprise why things seemed rocky between them.

Hey Maggie," I said after a while and she looked over at me, her brush paused in midair, I think she could hear the worry in my voice.

"What is it?"

"What happens…" I started, almost afraid of what that answer might be. "What happens when we move on, Hera and I can't keep up with vehicles?" I said and she got an alarmed look on her face. "And you know I'm never going anywhere without her, if you go, I'm staying with her."

"I don't know Jem, but we will not just leave you." She seemed to say it to comfort herself as well as me.

"I'm just a burden to the group; I… shouldn't have accepted Rick's invitation." I rested my head against Hera's warm neck.

"No, it's just a little bump, we will figure something out, you'll see." She tried to reassure me, but it just wasn't working.

(Hope you enjoyed it, you know the drill, review please and I'll love you forever. Thanks a bunch for reading!)


	4. Chapter 4

(I was too hooked to take a break, so here is chapter four, and I am very happy with it. Enjoy!)

Morning came slowly and softly to the camp. It had been another quiet night thankfully and now the birds sung loudly in the trees. They made it so easy to forget that the world had ended, it sounded like any other morning, I could have just been on an overnight trail ride, which would explain why I woke in a tent. But alas it wasn't so and I couldn't fool myself in to thinking that, not even for just a second. It would only make this life now hurt more. I climbed out of my tent and straight into my jacket, there will a chill in the morning air and I could see my breath floating away. The sun was still fighting to break through the mist as I made my way to the fire, waving to Glenn who was doing watch as I passed.

Not many were up at this time; it was just Glenn, Rick, Carol, and myself right now. The rest would stir soon, but the wee hours of the morning were usually mostly undisturbed. Most of the time Daryl could be seen up as well, cleaning his crossbow, sharpening a knife, slipping off for a squirrel before Rick could argue about going out alone. Although I doubted that Rick worried much about Daryl on his own. But he was nowhere to be found this morning, which hardly surprised me. I was curious as to how his face would look and I wouldn't feel bad one bit. That was for sure.

Carol shot me a look as she sat across the low fire, clutching a mug. It wasn't necessarily a mean look, more like she was sizing me up. I knew that she and Daryl had an interesting relationship, he was so deadest in finding her daughter and I figured that in that trying time they had grown close. Although close for Daryl was still distant to other people, people who didn't understand or care to, but it was a big step for a person like him. Our eyes met over the smoldering embers and she smiled at me, I was relieved because it was warm, there was kindness in her eyes. I returned the gesture and then shoved my hands into my pockets to warm them.

It wasn't much longer before everyone was up; I had finished my breakfast when Maggie plopped down next to me. Glenn joined her shortly, after being relieved by T-Dog. He gave her cheek a quick peck and I smiled, they were sweet and refreshing. It was uplifting to see their love even in a time like this.

"Have you seen Daryl?" Glenn asked and I shook my head. "I didn't see him at all this morning during watch, I wonder where he is?" He paused and I could see he was considering his words before he spoke again. "I can't believe you punched him like that," he whispered, as if it was a big secret. I laughed, not bothering to keep my voice down.

"He was asking for it," I told him and he shook his head grinning.

"I just can't believe you got away with it." The morning was relatively uneventful after that, although Lori complimented me on my hook right hook. Finally Daryl emerged from the woods, there was blood on his shirt and at least two squirrels hung off his shoulder, although the blood told me there had been more. He moved off quickly, before I could get a good look at his face and he disappeared into his tent. Maggie glanced at me, a smirk pulling at her lips and I gave a small giggle. What a sourpuss. Oh well, he would get over it.

After helping around the camp with a few things I hurried over to Hera, wanting to groom her so that she looked like I polished her and then ride, we hadn't for so long! When I was satisfied with her coat I did her lead rope up in her halter like reins and swung up onto her sleek back. I turned her to where I saw Rick standing and stopped a little in front of him. He stroked Hera's nose absentmindedly for a moment which made me wonder how much he had been around horses before, he seemed pretty relaxed with my mare.

"I'm just going to go out for a quick gallop, she needs to stretch her legs and I need some time for myself." I told him. He studied me for a moment, and I could tell he was thinking.

"Well you can't go alone," he said.

"There is a long field not far at all from here, we won't be long, it'll be fine." I argued.

"I still want someone to go with you. You never know what can happen out there." His voice was firm.

"But everyone else is busy, no one can go." Most of the women were working on preparing lunch or washing clothes. Glenn was catching up on his sleep after watch last night and T-Dog was doing watch still. Hershel and Rick were taking a break from discussing what we should do next. Anyway Rick shouldn't leave the group and Hershel was up in his years, he shouldn't be following after me on horseback. That left only one person and from the look in Rick's eyes I knew he had already figured that out. "No." I flatly said.

"Please or I'll have to tell you that you can't go." I would have to listen too, I wasn't on my own anymore, I couldn't just do as I pleased and I gritted my teeth.

"Fine," I hissed as I released the air I had been holding in my lungs. Sure we had figured things out, but that didn't mean I wanted to spend time with the guy.

"Thank you." Rick sighed, seeming relieved and he went over to talk to Daryl who sat sharpening his large hinting knife. It took a little before they walked back over, Daryl seemed a little cross, the bruise his face was coming in quite nicely, so I figured that was one reason. It shaded his cheek a nice blue and green color, luckily for him is wasn't very big and wouldn't last too long.

"Let's go." He gruffly said and I turned Hera toward the woods. Once we entered its shady depths, the cool air felt so nice and I was so ready for fall to fix its grasp on us, it wouldn't be too long now.

"You don't have to stick with me; I'll be fine on my own." I informed him, and he looked up at me, his blue eyes stopping for a moment on my hand where it sat on the hilt of my hunting knife.

"If you say so," he said and raised his eyebrows in submission. "I'll be close, if you need back up, just yell." He said then slipped off, probably to hunt squirrels. I think he liked hunting squirrels because they weren't always the easiest target, they hardly ever sat still, flitting about all over the place. I bet he did it half to show off that he could hit such a small and unpredictable target. I huffed softly, he could just suit his self, what did I care, I was free now. Or at least free for a little.

When I lost sight of him I dropped down on Hera's neck as she walked, she immediately stopped and turned to look at me. I buried my head in her mane, breathing in her sweet smell. My arms wrapped around her neck and I sat there for a moment, just feeling myself relax, breathing in and out slowly and calmingly. After sometime I sat up, took in a deep breath and urged her to the field, we trotted there, I had to focus on letting my hips rock with her because riding bareback was not simple but I had much improved since the first day I tried. I didn't fall off as much as I used to and lucky for me, she had a nice broad back which made it that much easier to stay on.

When we reached the field I let her open up and we flew, soared over the ground and it didn't take but a minute for my spirits to life and a huge smile to stretch across my lips. It was so exhilarating, so freeing, so much fun. I laughed out loud with joy as we tore around the field, so glad to have some time to forget my fears and free my mind. We didn't go for too long but I could see Hera enjoyed it as much as me, tossing her head and giving a few playful bucks as we raced. Momentarily throwing me up toward her withers and I almost shouted as I caught a glimpse of the ground rushing past underneath me, I really would prefer not to meet it. Thankfully she slowed her pace; allowing me to fix my seat again and I shook my head at her, my face giving away my joy in this moment. This is what I lived for. We went for one more pass, she was slowing, burning up her energy quickly, and as we gently loped along I let go of the lead rope reins and held my arms out. I closed my eyes and the cool wind tickled my face, the sensation was so much like flying, it sent such a peace to my heart I could hardly stand it. But all too soon I had to pull her up and head back to camp, I saw him then, standing at the edge of the woods, a few squirrels hanging from a string across his back. He watched us with something like wonder but as we approached it was gone.

"Have fun?" He sarcastically asked.

"Yes, I did actually," I retorted smartly and we trotted right past him.

We were about half way back to camp when it wandered across my path, turning its clouded eyes in my direction and giving a raspy growl. Suddenly they were all around Hera and me. She spun around, almost unseating me and seeing us surrounded she let out a worried snort, then lashed out. Her back hoof taking out one walker, as one ran for her side my knife was in my hand and through its skull. She reared and pawed at another, taking it down then stamping it into the ground. But it was too much for me, with a sharp cry I was thrown from her back, onto my shoulder. I heard a pop but I didn't have time to register the pain, I was on my feet in seconds and charging another rotting and hungry walker, shoving the knife into its eye, then again to make sure it was dead.

"Jem!" I heard Daryl shout a little ways behind us but I didn't have time to respond, another walker was bearing down on me. Hera was breaking them but she didn't know to go for their heads, I could see the fear in her eyes as they rose again after she kicked one down.

"Hera, go, back to camp," I yelled at her and she gave one last kick with her back legs before tearing off, her golden coat rolling over her strong muscles, leaving me alone to face the pack. She left pretty many unable to rise again, but they still withered around on the ground and I had to be careful. I fought viciously, hoping Daryl would come soon.

A walker came toward me, arms outstretched and I could hear another behind me. I quickly spun around and bashed in that one's skull but I was too slow turning back because suddenly that walker was on me. It pushed me to the ground, I braced against its shoulder, working my knees up between its body and mine but I just couldn't kick it off. Blood from its mouth dripped onto my face and its teeth snapped closed inches away from my nose. I felt panic and fear taking over my body and I knew I wouldn't be making it out of this one. With one last desperate push with my knees I tried to get it off but it was too heavy, I couldn't. I didn't want to accept my fate, killed by a walker; I didn't want to die, not like this. I wanted to keep fighting but what more could I do, my arms were growing weak, I couldn't hold it back much longer, they shook with exhaustion and started to give under its dead weight.

Just then the creature was torn off me and the twang of a bow told me it now sported an arrow in the head. I heard the crossbow sing and few more times, along with the slashing of a knife before it grew quiet. I lay there, chest heaving, unable to rise; I just wanted to catch my breath. He stood over me, his blue eyes filled with worry; he slung the bow over his shoulder and kneeled next to me. His dark red, brown hair was plastered to his forehead and he looked me over, checking for any major damage.

"Are you okay? Were you bit?" He asked.

"No, I wasn't," I gasped and slowly sat up to see the corpses scattered all around us. "I'm fine." I said, wiping my hand across my bloody face. He scooted back a bit to give me room but still watched me warily. I took in a deep breath to settle myself and leaned on my left arm to try to get up. Pain vibrated from the whole length, piercing me all the way to my back and I gave a small whimper and jerked off it.

"You're fine," he sarcastically grunted.

"Shut up," I growled and searched my arm for the source of the pain. "It's not broken, just sprained," I informed him, hoping I was right. "I'll live." And with that I stood, cradling my left arm, my shoulder screamed at the movement but I ignored it, I was too tough to let this get the best of me.

"I don't know what to say about you Jem. I don't know what to call you either, but it is between stupid and brave," he said searching my face, strained at the effort of fighting back a scream and I wasn't quite sure if that was a compliment or not.

"Well thanks, I think," I forced past my gritted teeth, to which he returned me a lazy little smirk.

"Can you walk?"

"Of course I can walk, I didn't sprain my legs." I snapped, pulled myself together, and started to head toward camp with him following right along next to me. Suddenly we heard rustling, I gripped the hilt of my knife, unsure if I could take many more walkers and Daryl stepped up so he was ahead of me a little, bow cocked and pointed toward the sound. Rick got to us first, bushing through a bush; I couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief.

"I heard yelling and then Hera came running to camp without you, we feared the worst," he breathlessly said. And shortly later the rest of the group came up behind me. "Are you hurt?" He demanded looking at me.

"It's nothing, I'll be fine." I shook it off.

"This bitc…" Daryl paused then corrected himself. "She is crazy, her and that horse took down nearly a dozen walkers and when I got to her she was pinned down by one but yet she still has the strength to be a smartass." He said it in such a way that I caught the sound of admiration in his voice but I think it might have only been just me.

"You-what happened," Rick seemed beside himself.

"They just appeared out of nowhere and had Hera and I surrounded before I knew what was happening. She unseated me and there were so many I figured my best bet was to send her back to camp for help." I explained.

"And where were you?" Rick looked at Daryl.

"I was hunting some squirrels," and he held up his catch. I looked at him in astonishment, what was he doing?

"I thought I told you to stay together!"

"I wanted some meat tonight, so I went off," he lied, why was he taking the blame for me?

"I can't believe you would do that," Rick looked tired. He ran his hand over his face. "We can't stay here, it's not safe anymore." He groaned. "Don't you ever split up again, I'm serious, everyone stays together."

We made our way back to camp, I wanted to find Daryl and demand an answer for why he did that but Maggie had my good arm and was leading me back to camp. She washed me up and got me changed and comfortable, had Hershel look at my arm, which was only a sprain as I said, all in tight lipped silence.

"Okay, what happened?" She questioned when I was finally settled.

"It wasn't Daryl's fault," I started out and her eyebrows rose in surprise.

"That's the last thing I would have ever expected to hear from your mouth. You're defending him?"

"Oh hush. I told him to leave me alone and then went out ahead of him. I don't know why he took the blame for me." I fixed the position of my arm in my new sling to make it a little more comfortable.

"You know," she smirked after a little time to think. "You and Daryl are perfect for each other," she teased.

"Now you better hush up," I warned.

"Really, hear me out," she laughed and I decided to humor her. "You're both stubborn, short tempered, passionate, brash, unreasonable, ornery, hardheaded, fierce-"

"Does this have a point?" I cut her off.

"Let me finish. Loyal, confident, knowledgeable, resourceful. There would never be a dull moment." She nudged my good arm with her elbow. "I think I see a real future for you there," okay, now she crossed a line.

"You are delusional. The only outcome of a relationship between the two of us would be someone dead and that someone would be him." I explained and she just laughed again.

"We'll see."

"Oh no we won't," I corrected her but she just flashed me a playful smile. "You are the unreasonable one Maggie, not me." I added.

(I really hoped you liked it, please review, it means the world to me! I hope to have the fifth out tomorrow, of course that might not happen. I have to work for half the day but fingers crossed!)


	5. Chapter 5

(Chapter five! Hot off the press for you all! Again I apologize for any mistakes and such, I look over it a few times but I can't always catch it all! Thanks for reading!)

"Rick, I can do it, I swear." I argued.

"I told you, you can't go alone and one day is nowhere near long enough healing time for that sprain." I guess he was right but I wanted to contribute, I wanted to do something for the group, I was not one for just sitting around and 'healing'.

"What else can we do? Hera doesn't run on gas, we couldn't run out and be stuck. You have a problem and I have the solution here." I laid it out, stubborn was my middle name.

"We will just have to think up another solution," the tone of his voice told me the discussion was over. I figured it was best to just give it up but I made sure my glare made it clear I didn't like his decision.

I was miserable. It had only been one day, not even, and I was already sick of not being able to do anything with my stupid shoulder. I couldn't help but snap at people and mope around; there was no point in trying to sit still, it wouldn't happen, so I walked. I walked the perimeter, making sure no walkers lurked close by and for a while Hera walked with me, which I was sure looked funny. After sometime she got bored and wandered off to eat.

Finally growing tired of walking I decided I could at least gather firewood. I managed to scoop up a few with my good arm and started to make my way toward camp. I was just about there when they started to slide, I did my best to balance them but there was no chance, they toppled to the ground with a clatter.

"Damn it," I swore loudly, my temper flaring.

"What the hell are you doing?" I heard Daryl's gruff voice demand.

"I'm getting firewood, what does it look like," as if it wasn't already obvious.

"With a sprained shoulder, I see how well that's going," he snapped back. "You should be resting, instead of doing shit like this and making it worse."

"Yes mother," I rolled my eyes.

"Seriously, I didn't rescue your ass just for you to keep hurting yourself," he spat at me as he scooped up the fallen wood. I hesitated for a moment, the way he said it, it was… it was almost like I actually meant something to him. It hinted at the possibility that he might actually like me at least a little and was watching out for me. Not that I needed him to or anything. But it changed things in my mind. It changed them a lot.

"Yeah well, excuse me," I tried to cover up my pause. "And you shouldn't have taken the blame for me," I told him but he just shrugged.

"It's not like I got into trouble," he muttered, brushing it off, and then carried the wood away. "Crazy lady…" I heard him mutter as he moved away.

It took a few days before Hershel finally let me get rid of my sling and start using my arm again. Sure it was stiff and sore, but I didn't care, I was so glad to be able to work again. I had spent those few days in so much misery no one really wanted to be around me, although Hera's coat was better groomed than any horse's coat has ever been.

By now of course Rick had already set a plan for fuel into motion. They took the one car, a Honda and Daryl followed along with his motorcycle so if something happened they would have at least one way to escape or send for help. It took two trips before they finally found some gas and supplies. To my surprise they also returned with a gift. An amazing and very much appreciated gift and just perfect gift, I couldn't be happier.

"I hope you know how to drive stick," Rick said as he handed me the keys to a beefy Ford truck and attached to the back was a trailer. Just a simple two horse trailer, nothing fancy but it was all I could have ever wanted.

"We were lucky Daryl spotted it and it was good he pointed out how it would make Hera traveling with us a lot easier," Glenn explained, which meant I owed Daryl twice now.

"It's great, I don't know how to thank you," I gushed, it relieved so much stress from my shoulders.

"It won't be the best on gas so we are going to have to be careful." Rick said and I nodded in agreement, but inside I was ecstatic. And of course the first person I told was Maggie. She swallowed me up in a bone crunching hug, relief shinning in her eyes.

"Thank goodness," she sighed.

"I know, it takes such a burden off my shoulders," I smiled at her.

"And it is all thanks to Daryl," she winked. I felt the smile bend into a frown and I glared at her, but it was empty. I couldn't really be upset with her, she had been too good of a friend to me. I just wanted her to know the comment wasn't appreciated.

"Maggie," my tone warned her.

"How will you ever thank him, he is your hero!"

"Hero," I snorted. "I didn't need his help, he didn't have to. Why he did, I don't know but I am grateful."

"How grateful?" She winked at me and I felt a hot blush warm my cheeks.

"Maggie Green!" I let my bewilderment show and she laughed.

"I am going to visit Hera, at least she won't make such remarks," I stuck my tongue out her, humoring her basically. "Feel free to join me when you can behave yourself," I called over my shoulder.

My dun mare stood off to the side of camp, happily tearing at the lush green grass. Just a few paces away the creek tinkled softly, turning this into a heavenly place to be. With the creeks chatter and the soothing sound of Hera chewing. I sat in the grass close to her and she wandered over, sticking her soft nose into my face for a moment, her sweet breath tickling my face and filling my nose. I laughed quietly and ran my hand up her forehead, playing with her forelock a moment. Her gentle eyes watched me and I felt my heart swell. After I stopped petting her, when my hands were black from the action, she turned away and resumed munching again. I soaked up the moment before bidding her goodbye and heading back to camp to see what needed to be done.

After lunch Carol, Lori, Beth and I gathered the dishes and headed down to the creek. Using soap that had been scavenged, as well as some rags, we gave the dishes a good cleaning. The cool water felt good rushing past my fingers. For a good while we were quiet but then Carol spoke up.

"So how have you been feeling Lori?" She sighed and straightened up, placing her hands on the small of her back and stretching. It wasn't very obvious that she was pregnant just yet, she had a very small bulge but it wouldn't be long before her belly started to grow with the baby.

"I am feeling pretty well," she answered.

"That's good," Carol nodded. "I remember when I was pregnant with…" she paused for a moment, it had been such an innocent conversation but then anything really could bring up the memories of lost loved ones. "When I was pregnant." She corrected. "All I wanted was to eat was popcorn, I had such a strange craving for it. I usually don't like popcorn at all." We all smiled and Lori quickly spoke up, probably to keep Carol from thinking more about Sophia.

"When I was pregnant with Carl I craved macaroni and cheese day in and day out." She laughed.

"Oh you all are making me hungry," Beth groaned.

"I could really go for some french fries right about now…" I spoke up and they all got hungry looks on their faces.

"Chicken and dumplings," Carol sighed.

"Pizza, three cheese pizza with everything on it," Beth rubbed her stomach.

"Pot Pie," Lori smiled.

"Cheesecake brownies," everyone looked at me and we busted up laughing.

"Now I am really hungry," Beth complained and we giggled some more. It was nice to just goof around a little like that.

After all the dishes had been done I was going to try to find Maggie. She and Glenn had snuck off early and I didn't need to know any more on that subject, I wondered if she would be back yet. As I halfheartedly searched I caught sight of Daryl coming my way and as much as it pained me, I was going to have to thank him.

"Hey, thanks," I said as he came closer.

"For what?" He grunted but I had a feeling he knew.

"For pointing out the trailer, for getting it for me and Hera, thank you," this time I did my best to sound as sincere as I felt and I saw him soften a little.

"It's no big deal," he tried to shrug it off.

"Well it's not to me," I informed him and then headed off to gather more dishes. I paused and threw a smartass comment over my shoulder, I couldn't help it. "Now stop making me owe you damn it!" I heard a low chuckle and could feel him watch me as I started walking away again; I wondered what he was thinking. Maybe I could throw him for as much as a loop as he had me, just when I thought I had him figured out, he went and did something like this.

The next day we shoved off, finally leaving that sight behind, we had hung around a little too long. Since we had finally found gas and supplies, it was past time to move on, before some walkers ruined this spot. It was good to leave it on a happy note, or at least I thought so.

I drove the truck with Hera secure in the back; this was such a luxury I hadn't had in a very long time. This morning I had cut as much tall grass from the field as I could managed with the help of Maggie and Carl. At least Hera would have something to keep her busy back there. I hoped this would work. She had loaded quietly enough, before all this we had done a good bit of trailer before, for trails and the occasional show when I was talked into it. I wasn't worried about the trailering part; it was the gas guzzling part that I worried about now. This wouldn't be simple but it would work as long as we made sure we didn't get too low.

"So, even after this you want to tell me you're still completely against Daryl?" Maggie teased from the passenger seat.

"You're lucky I'm busy driving," I glared at her, just then, by some dumb luck he raced past on his motorcycle to take the lead. He leaned back so casually, one hand hung by his side and his face gave away no emotion at all.

"Speak of the devil," Maggie laughed and I couldn't help but grin as I shook my head.

Time passed pretty quickly, soon we hit fall and the chill in the air reminded us that winter was coming; it actually made me miss summer and the unforgiving heat. We moved all over in search of a place to make home but nothing we found would be secure enough. Sometimes we would stay a night; sometimes we would get chased out by walkers. It was a crazy life. Lori was now starting to be noticeably pregnant and it kind of hit me, we would be bringing such a sweet, innocent life into this cruel and cold world. How was that going to go?

Since finding the trailer for me, my acquaintance with Daryl had started to turn into a bit of a friendship I guess. We joked around every now and then, poking fun at each other, but we always ended up friends in the end. I found that I enjoyed his company and well, he wasn't so bad.

"Alright, looks like it's you, me, Glenn, and Maggie. Rick wants us to split up and search this place, maybe find a good spot to crash for the night, gather supplies, and well… We need to make sure Lori gets a good, warm place to sleep and some food for the baby." He said, his voice getting a little raspy when he talked about the coming baby, he was such a softy. But we all shared the same concern for Lori and her unborn baby.

We took the east end of the town, it was small and cute, it must have been a fun place to live in before. We searched building to building, we found no survivors and a couple walkers but other than that the place was a ghost town. We met up with the group once more to give our findings then settled on a place, it was ground level, to make sure we had escape routes and we made sure Lori had a comfortable bed.

Daryl, Glenn, Maggie and I slipped down the street, the sun was falling and long shadows covered the roads. We were headed for the grocery store, looking for nonperishable foods, medical supplies, and whatever else we could find. The breeze was pretty cold and I pulled the collar of my worn leather jacket up to protect my neck. I stared at the back of Daryl's vest, the once white angle wings on it had seen better days, I couldn't really remember seeing him without that leather vest. He held his hands up and waved us forward, we ran over to the front of the store, our boots making soft thuds on the blacktop, Maggie. Daryl and I kept an eye out for walkers or people as Glenn cut the chain across the doors, I heard the pinches snap and the chain clattered to the ground, we were in.

The store was relatively untouched, apart from the store owners, just two of them. I wiped the blood from one of them off onto my grimy jeans, I hoped we could get our stuff washed or replaced soon, my clothes were pretty bad. We shoved everything and anything we could find that would help us into our bags and then stole away, the only disturbance being the dead walkers on the floor.

We locked the building up tight, someone had already boarded up the windows and a few doors, which was helpful but as long as no walkers knew we were here, as long as we were quiet, we would have no problems. Lori got the mattress we found upstairs and the rest of us spread our blankets out on the floor. I smiled at Maggie, who sat across from me, head resting on Glenn's shoulder, his arm was wrapped around her, weren't they special, finding love in a time like this. I turned my attention to Carol who dishing out corn and beans that we found in the store. Lori was given the last of the meat we had left over, we had found plenty of bags of dried jerky and such, but we were going to save that.

Happy to have a roof over our head and warm place to spend the night, we soon curled up in our blankets and tried to get some rest, all of us but Rick. He paced from room to room, looking out at the dark street, keeping check, keeping us safe. But it was more than that; things were still pretty bad between him and Lori. Maggie and I sometimes brought it up, always in hushed tones. It was such a shame, they had fallen so far apart and I really hoped they would be able to pick things back up. I wished I could help but I knew it was best to just stay out of it; it was never good to go meddling in peoples personal lives.

That morning I rose before the sun, along with everyone else. By time the morning had come we were packed and ready to go, our breath hovering in the early light. I got Hera from a high fenced in backyard where she spent the night grazing on the grass and put her in her trailer, ready to go. Then I grabbed Maggie and once more we collected as much grass as we could before we headed out.

(Yeah I know, the last bit was a bit vague but I promise the next chapter will be better, I just didn't really know what to put there. So I promise I'll really slave away on chapter 6, you won't be disappointed! So please review, let me know what you think of all my hard work :) I would really appreciate it!)


	6. Chapter 6

(So this is my longest chapter yet, yay chapter 6! Although I feel like even though they have been wordy, they are lacking. But I promise (cross my heart and hope to die) they will get better ASAP! There is some good stuff coming up, just you all watch.)

Winter was drawing close, it was getting colder, a lot colder and we needed to find some place we could at least call home for the winter. We searched and searched but were fruitless; the days grew much shorter and the night's temperatures were dropping. We couldn't really risk building large fires and we were doing our best to try to save our gas in the vehicles, it was rough but I never really thought of it as bad. It was merely a challenge and I loved to rise to a challenge.

Finally we found a place, it was a brick home, out in the middle of nowhere but still not too far from a town, about two miles. It had a barn and field but the more important part was it was brick. It would be a good bit safer than a wooden house. It would stand up better to the walkers. So we boarded up all the downstairs openings, windows and doors, all but one, and well it was going to have to do. We made sure that if a herd came through we would be set to wait them out, whether it took hours or days.

The fire place was nice; it wasn't a big house so it was easy to warm and the barn and fenced in paddock was just right for Hera. If any walkers came, she would be okay, I knew that. But just as a precaution Daryl helped me walker proof the barn too, so that if worse came to worse, I could run down and lock her up. The barn was a roomy bank barn with five stalls; we patched up all the holes on the outside, and made it so it only had one useable door that could be tightly locked. It would be pretty dark inside but it would be safe and that was all that mattered. But most days anymore it was quiet, we wondered if maybe the cold slowed the walkers down a bit.

Standing with the group admiring our new winter home, I felt content. It would do and it would do very nicely. It was better than I could have hoped for. From the looks on the groups' faces, I could see that they all agreed. Nights we were warm and comfortable. The women crashed in what had been the living room and the guys were across the hall in the old dining room. Lori got one of the upstairs rooms with the bed and privacy, she insisted she didn't need it but we wouldn't take no for an answer.

I made sure Hera was locked up tight every night with enough grass to keep her busy as well as plenty of water. I was always prepared for a herd; you never knew when they might come so I was ready. She didn't seem to mind the stall too much, although I had always made sure she was turned out whenever possible in our past life. But during bad weather she would come in, so at least she understood the concept of a stall. That was a blessing.

Two days after we got there and finished fixing up the house and barn, Daryl and I headed out for wood, we decided to gather a lot, you never knew when it might be needed. We took Hera out with us, attaching an old cart we found in the barn to her, so she could help us bring wood in. It had been a good while since she had last drove a cart but it didn't take too long for her to get used to it again. It was mostly silent as we walked, it was compatible silence though, he watched my back and I watched his, it was a wordless agreement we had.

"I actually did have a reason for coming to Georgia," I suddenly admitted and he glanced over at me, seeming a little surprised but a lot more curious. He held his bow, muscles tense and ready to react at a moment's notice, but other than that the rest of his attention was on me.

"Oh really," he murmured, he tended to do that, only raising his voice when he was making a point or was ticked off.

"I came down here because…" I could hardly believe I was going to tell him this, to expose myself to him so but then again, I knew I could trust him. Of all the people, he was the one I wanted to tell because I knew he would be able to understand. "Because this is where I last heard my dad was," I sighed and his mouth formed a silent "oh" and he nodded gravely. "After everything he did, I wanted to find him… And kill him." His eyes flew to me and I had a feeling he was having trouble believing that. He understood that I could be like him, I could get angry, I could kill when I needed to, but to kill someone out of anger like that, he knew that wasn't me.

"Kill him?" He echoed, straightening, his mouth forming a hard line.

"I… Yes." I stopped walking and let my head drop, leaning back against Hera. "Pay back for all the beatings, for the neglect, for robbing me and my brother of a childhood, for the memories, the nightmares, for the fear of trusting and fear of men." I looked him right in the eyes and I saw pain, raw, uncut pain as he relived his own past in his mind. "He… The only thing he deserves is a bullet in the head." He clenched his jaw, I could tell because the muscles in his cheek popped out.

"He had so many drunken rages and so many sober rages. He beat me black and blue just for lifting a finger. I got a job at 13 and he took the money, I barely kept enough to buy food for me and my brother, hardly enough to keep us alive." He listened to me rant in silence, allowing me to go on, I had to tell someone this, I couldn't bottle it up any longer and I think he knew that. "You know where I worked? I worked at a barn. I used to run into the woods behind our house and hide, of course I'd be punished whenever I went back, but still I ran anyway because I found something." I paused and my fingers found my way to Hera's mane, I twirled the wire like hair between my fingers. She looked around at me, her big brown eyes studying me, but they didn't judge or show hate, they showed innocence and love.

"I found horses and nothing would keep me away. I worked there until I was 18, until I could take my brother and hide from my father. They hid us at the barn, they promised to look after my brother while I went to college and he finished school. And they kept their word, I did go to college, I became successful against all odds, my brother too. But he left his mark and… I want him dead. Now there is no law that can stop me, walker or not, I want to kill him so bad." I bit my lip, fighting the pressure behind my eyes, my voice had started to crack and reveal my weakness but he looked at me like the horses did. He looked with understanding, nonjudgmental eyes.

"I understand that words can't describe it. I know how it feels to hate that person so bad you only want them dead. But is killing him really the answer?" He reasoned with me and I balled my hands into fists. "You couldn't find him anyway and most likely he is already dead." His voice was steady and true.

"I just want the hurt to go," I felt my lip quiver, I was shaking, losing control, I could feel my anger boiling. I stepped away from Hera and kicked at a stone sending it flying into a tree. I heard her shy away a step, unsure of my fury, she didn't know this person. "It sucks," I growled and worked to calm myself for her sake.

"I know," he answered. "But you know what, forget that bastard. What he did, it's in the past, it doesn't mean a damn thing anymore. You keep proving that you are better than him, be what he wasn't man enough to be." I turned to face him, he was looking at me hard and I gave a brisk nod.

"Thanks," I said running a hand down my face.

"Sure," he shrugged it off.

"We should get moving," I pointed out and he grunted in agreement. Maybe it didn't seem like he did much for me but he had done more than anyone had, he knew what to say.

It wasn't long before we returned to camp with a cart full of wood and had it stacked in the house, ready to be burned and keep us warm. It seemed like we could be safe here, as long as we kept our noses clean, make sure we didn't do anything that would attract walkers, we would be fine. I got Hera in the barn, locked up tight with the grass we cut for her. I spent a long moment with her, stroking her glossy golden hide which was growing thicker by the day as her winter coat came in. I gave her nose a quick peck and bid my sweet mare goodnight.

The rest of us made our way into the house to get settled for the night. We set up night watch in the second story, one at the front and one at the back. They looked out two windows which gave us a pretty much perfect view of the whole property. I bedded down on the floor of the living room, a worn sleeping bag under me for cushion and wrapped in a relatively thick blanket. A couch cushion was pillowed under my head and I felt a sigh escape my body. It was so interesting how this world made you content with the simple things. Back in our old lives people would complain when they had a roof over their head, a fridge full off food, a comfy bed, and safety. I had none of those things but I had a feeling right now I was more satisfied than those people.

I rolled on to my side and I could hear shuffling behind the sheet we had hung to give the women in the living room privacy. Low voices drifted to my ears but I couldn't make out the words, I wouldn't eves drop either. It sounded like Lori and Rick, I flipped over to face away from them, my hearing on that side wasn't as good and I couldn't hear them at all anymore. I told myself I would stay out of it. Yawning once I decided I would try to get some rest because in a bit I was going to be taking my turn doing watch.

I study the outside world from the chair we had at the window as morning came, the sky was a rich pink and birds scurried around in the chilly air. The world looked so cold with everything covered in a light layer of frost. It twinkled in the light as the sun woke, turning it from a cold looking place to a shining and sparkling fairy tale. Across the hall I heard T-Dog rise and stretch, letting out a small groan.

"I am so ready for breakfast," I heard him whisper and I smiled.

"I know, I was afraid my growling stomach might attract walkers," I joked.

"Oh! That's what that was," he answered, his voice sporting fake surprise. "I thought for sure it was a walker sneaking up on us."

"Very funny," I hissed back, quietly laughing to myself, it was moments like that, that I lived for. It wasn't long before the smell of breakfast drifted up the stairs to us. Silently we scurried down to find the source, my stomach yelling at me for waiting so long to feed it. We found eggs cooking over the fire, what a treat!

"These people had chickens, somehow they managed to stay alive," Carol gleefully said and I figured that's what occupied the little shed on the other side of the house.

"So that means chicken is on the menu now?" Carl looked hopeful.

"Possibly," Carol responded and started to divvy up the scrambled eggs, I smiled thankfully as I took them before taking a seat on the floor next to Maggie.

"How'd watch go?" She asked and had to wait because I was a little busy feeding my noisy tummy.

"It was very quiet, I think we might have found a good place here," I grinned then started to eat again.

"Yeah, not a peep," T-Dog agreed and Loir sighed.

"It would be nice if it could stay that way," she wistfully said and we all silently nodded in agreement. It wasn't long before Rick came through the door, he looked pretty un-rested, deep bags hung under his eyes and he was starting to sport more than just a stubbly beard. He and Lori made awkward eye contact before he took a seat across the room. I saw the way Carl looked between them, he didn't seem to understand what was going on between his parents but it was obvious it pained him.

We enjoyed the peacefulness of the little house and the area around it, it was calm and quiet. Only two walkers were spotted in a few days and we quickly disposed of them.

"I guess there isn't much to eat around here so they move on, where they are more likely to find food." Hershel suggested and well, it made sense to us.

"So Jem," Glenn started as we enjoyed a dinner of Chicken one evening. "Is Jem really your name?"

"No, actually it isn't," I answered and then wiped my mouth on the back of my hand. Manners had died with the rest of the world; it wasn't like we had napkins. "My real name is Jamie but I wasn't a huge fan, too girly sounding for me, so I decided on Jem. I grew up tomboy, it was boyish, and therefore I liked it." I laughed.

"Ah," Glenn nodded and smiled with me.

"I like Jem," Maggie spoke up.

"What would we call you Maggie, your name is pretty girly," Glenn teased. "Iggy? Mags?"

"What about you? Your name is pretty girly too," she quickly retorted and he gave a short laugh.

"Touché," he held up his hands in a peace offering. "Iggy it is," he declared after a short pause, just when he thought he was finished and we laughed as Maggie halfheartedly punched his shoulder.

"Shut up," she weakly complained, chuckling as well.

It grew colder and colder and about time we made a run for supplies. There was a little talk with Rick about it and it was decided that Maggie, Glenn and I would go with Daryl. We were the groups go to supply run team, we were fast and efficient. We took Hershel's older Chevy Silverado; it had a good bit of room to it so that meant we could grab plenty. There was a list, food, medicine, bedding, and warmer clothes for the coming winter and we hoped it would be easy to get all of that. We piled into the SUV, Daryl drove, I was shot gun and Glenn and Maggie were in the back.

From the corner of my eye I saw Glenn take Maggie's hand and smile at her which made a little smile pull at my lips. I saw Daryl glance over at me, a frown drawing his eyebrows in and he squinted his eyes questioningly but I just turned away, he wouldn't understand.

The drive was short and we slowly crept into the town, the truck was parked in the middle of the main street so that it would be easy to get to and then a quick escape. As we stepped from the vehicle all seemed quiet, too quiet almost, there wasn't a sound. I looked over to Daryl who nodded and then to Glenn and Maggie. We split then, Glenn and Daryl going to for food and Maggie and I went for the medicine. We grabbed everything we figured we would need plus some. After stowing it in the bed we then moved to the quaint little clothing shop down the block. Above the small building once cheerful words informed us that the place was called Cara's Clothing.

"This place must have been so cute before," Maggie sighed woefully.

"Almost as cute as you and Glenn," I have her arm a prod with my elbow.

"Oh shut up," she complained but I could tell she appreciated it. Sneaking in the front door we crept through the dark store, the place was empty thankfully.

We grabbed practical clothes, warm, simple but useful, but I was dying to grab the pretty dark purple jacket that sat up by the front window. I couldn't stop looking at it. There were jeans in everyone's sizes, which sadly had started to shrink; our meals could sometimes be few and far in-between. We got jackets and long sleeved warm shirts for everyone, it was so nice that this place was almost untouched, I mean who was going to go clothing shopping during a zombie apocalypse, but it was perfect for us now.

When we finally arrived at the truck and loaded the stuff up Daryl and Glenn returned, arms full of food, we could see that had gotten blankets and pillows first, oh pillows, what a luxury! The food was a great find. It was great that we had such a good bit of it too, like oatmeal, canned meats, fruits, and veggies, dried milk, peanut butter, dry pasta, saltine crackers, it was making me hungry to think about the food. After stowing our things in the truck we helped them bring the water out, we grabbed as much as we could, you could never have enough of the lifesaving liquid.

"See any walkers?" Daryl asked.

"None, how about you?" I answered.

"Just two, but that was all, they were stuck in the back of the grocery store." He explained and then admired me, one eyebrow cocked. "That's a nice jacket," his voice was teasing and despite myself I felt myself flush a little.

"I know and you can't have it," I quickly retorted but couldn't help but shove my hands in the pockets. It was nice, warm but not stuffy, it was slim fitting and it hugged me nicely.

"Bummer," he made a disappointed face which lasted a moment before he smirked.

"Hey guys, look over here," all of a sudden we heard Glenn call and we looked over to see him looking around the corner of a building. We wandered over to see him pointing at what appeared to be a gun store. We all looked at each other, excitement growing on our faces, if it was untouched, goodness it could be a gold mine. We hurried over to the entrance; Daryl grabbed the cutters from Glenn and snapped the chain in a second, pushing the door open roughly but what we saw made our hearts drop. It had obviously been visited by others, the back door, which we could see from the entrance, was busted in.

"They couldn't have taken everything," Maggie said, trying to be positive and thankfully she was right. It just wasn't as much as we were hoping for but we got a few guns and ammo, along with a two quivers full of arrows, how exciting. We also grabbed the knives that were left and anything else that could be useful. It was a hunting store, so we collected some traps and things; maybe we could booby trap the place, just in case.

"That wasn't a bad run," Glenn commented as we climbed into the car. Daryl grunted in agreement and started the truck up.

"That went very well," I agreed with him and sat back feeling pretty good.

(Sorry if this one wasn't as exciting, I am trying but I'm feeling a little writers block here, I feel as though I am rushing a bit because there is a good part coming up but I will try to slow down and add more substance in the next chapter! Thank you all my readers and I special thanks to my reviewers! Especially Dixiewinxwrites12 for reviewing the last couple chapters, I love it! Fingers crossed the next chapter comes out tomorrow! And I want to apologize ahead of time, I will be away Sunday and Monday looking at a college so I won't be able to update, sorry! Anyway, thanks a bunch for reading!)


	7. Chapter 7

(Yay! I am so glad I got this chapter out! I had a long day at work so I wasn't sure if this would happen but it did and I am so happy :) I am in LOVE with this story guys and that is saying something! Haha! I usually don't really like the stuff I do but I really think this is going good! I am going to start adding on to the stuff I already have written on my computer so it can be even longer! Joy! But anyway, here is chapter 7!)

For a while things were great, only a few walkers here and there, things were pretty good for everyone. We all had our things to do but sometimes we would find free time so we might pull out a deck of cards we found, or take the time for a nap. It was so good, too good, I had that feeling deep in my gut that it just couldn't stay with way, it was too perfect.

I could usually be found doing my chores, on watch, or with Hera. She wasn't in as good of shape as before, when we were constantly moving so I did what I could to keep her healthy. We didn't get much snow this winter, thankfully for us it was an easy one. Sometimes it would snow during the night and by the middle of the next day it would usually be just about gone. I enjoyed watching the snow fall but I wasn't so crazy about it when it settled on the ground. I sometimes would stand at the house, looking out over our peaceful world, wishing it could stay this way and that bad feeling would grow in my gut.

I felt so much pity for Carl, watching his parents avoiding each other, and being the only for who knows how far around his age. He was forced to grow up much too fast but then, I guess I knew what that was like. I would invite him to visit Hera with me, to brush her or feed her. Sometimes he would decline, he was prone to dark days, where he felt like he had to be an adult and be serious and stern. But the days he said yes were the best. At first the interactions were tense, he was stiff and reluctant and I spent most of the time in one-sided conversations. Of course haven't spent many years with horses, that isn't new or strange. I guessed he was trying to figure out my angle, what I wanted from him, and he was doing his best not to disappoint. It took a little time before he figured out that I didn't want anything, just company.

I showed him how to groom her and how to feed her goodies on rare occasions. Palm flat and as she lipped the pathetic old and shriveled carrot was when I saw it, a smile revealing just how young he really was. The first time it happened he quickly covered it, acting as though it hadn't happened, but I saw it and I let it warm my heart. But the second time, when I showed him what horses did to show friendship, that second time when he smiled he didn't hide it. I scratched her neck, right at her favorite spot just above her chest, and her nose started to wiggle.

"Move closer," I instructed Carl, he frowned, furrowing his eyebrows unsure what I wanted. But he did as I said and Hera reached her head out to him. At first he flinched, moving back half a step but then trusting me and her, he moved forward again. She placed her muzzle on his shoulder and started to gently nudge him.

"See what she is doing?" I asked and he watched her wild-eyed. He nodded slowly. "She is grooming you," I watched him carefully but not slowing my itching of her neck. "That's a sign between horses that they like each other, they will groom each other. It is a sign of companionship." He glanced at me and I could see the huge smile in his eyes before it stretched across his lips.

"It tickles," he giggled and then stepped away, unable to take it any longer. I laughed with him and felt my spirits soar.

"I know," we shared a peaceful moment in compatible friendship. I was so glad to have broken through his shell and to share a joy in this trying time.

"Can we feed her now?" He asked, the sun had reached the end of its assent and was starting to fall in the sky.

"Sure, why not? Do you want to lead her in?" At that he nodded eagerly and took her lead rope.

"Thank you," Lori whispered to me that night and I gave her a questioning look. "For what you are doing for Carl, I can't thank you enough." Emotions swam in her voice and I felt my face soften.

"It is my pleasure, really," and before I could even think another thought she had me wrapped up in a hug, her round belly pushing against my own. I smiled into her shoulder and embraced her back, feeling such an overwhelming rush of love, of belonging.

Later that week I was helping to haul wood in from the wood pretty close to the house, we were going through wood pretty quickly but it was okay, we could always get more anyway. T-Dog was whistling happily as we worked and Beth and Maggie cheerfully talking on the porch. Despite being winter the sun was warm, allowing me to open up my jacket, and I paused to wipe my arm across my sweaty brow. I let out a deep breath when I heard it; I heard the word shouted that we hoped we would never hear.

"Walkers!" It was Glenn, yelling to us from the second story window. "Walkers!" He yelled again. "It's a herd!" Maggie and Beth jumped to their feet and ran inside, T-Dog and I spun in the direction Glenn was pointing and we could see them, coming out of the woods on the far side of the property. They weren't moving too fast but it wouldn't take very long for them to be on us, especially if they saw, smelled, or heard us. T-Dog grabbed my arm and started to pull me up the steps to the porch. Thankfully everyone else was inside, since it was getting close to the end of the day, Carol had been preparing supper and our stomachs had just started to growl. Daryl stood in the door way, looking out at the bitters. He waved to us to hurry up so that they could close up the door and we could get ready to sit the walkers out, in hopes that they would keep moving past us.

"Hera," I breathed and stopped dead.

"Come on," T-Dog's voice was hushed but demanding.

"I have to put Hera in," I shook my arm from his grip and before he could stop me, fled from the steps and raced to the pasture. My heart was beating wildly in my chest, arms swishing at my sides, and my sturdy boots pounding the frozen ground. Where was she? I launched over the fence and slowed to a jog, looking for my mare. I couldn't describe how glad I was to see that she was grazing relatively close to the barn, which gave me time to get her in. I took off in her direction, she threw her head up in surprise when she saw me but I wasn't acting how I usually would, holding my hand out to her and sweetly talking as I finger combed her mane. Now I grabbed a handful and pulled, urging her to follow me, she did slowly but it was better than nothing. It wasn't far but the walkers were on the house when I finally got her to the open barn door, I let her walk past before I gave her rump a push.

"Go girl," I groaned then almost cried out as a figure appeared next to me, grabbing the door and giving my back a shove. I turned as I stumbled into the door way and almost sighed with relief, it was just Daryl. He closed the door tightly behind us and locked it with all the bolts we had put in, making it impossible to get in unless you had an axe or something. I leaned against the stone wall, breathing hard and I looked over at him in the dim light of the barn, with a look mixed with fear and thanks.

"You are damn crazy, you could have gotten killed." He growled quietly.

"I had to save her, you know that," I retorted in a hushed whisper.

"I know," he grumbled. "But you're still crazy."

I glared at him for a moment then stopped. "Thank you." I said then and he nodded but turned his attention to the door and held his finger up to of his lips, they were here.

I could hear their labored breathing and shuffling steps. My heart jumped into my throat and I was terrified, I looked over to Daryl and saw he was still trying to catch his breath, or maybe he was just as scared as I was. He looked at me and I saw any signs of fear slip away and he comfortingly bobbed his head which I took as him saying "it'll be alright." I gave a nervous half smile before turning to look at Hera. I could just make her out in the dark and what I saw wasn't good. She was staring where she knew the walkers were but couldn't see them, her eyes were rolling white and she seemed ready to freak out at any moment.

I slowly moved over to her, whispering soothingly, she lowered her head a little as I got closer, but still looked so frightened. As I got to her side she shoved her nose into my hand, giving a deep sigh but a moment later it was back in the air as a walker gave a loud and horrific groan. I ran my hands along her neck, thinking the happiest thoughts I could, I tried to keep my voice light and happy, while also making sure I was very quiet but luckily it seemed to be working. I wanted to move her from the isle to her stall, maybe that would make her feel more secure, I hoped it would but I wasn't sure if I wanted to risk moving her now. I waited, it could have been a minute or maybe ten, I didn't know but I couldn't really hear them so much anymore so I decided I would move her now.

I made it easy, I just grabbed an armful of grass for her and threw it in her stall, she quickly forgot the dead people that had her so scared before and followed the food. I locked the door and couldn't help but give a silent snort of amusement at my now worriless horse. I looked at Daryl to see he was starting to climb the ladder against the wall to the upstairs, unlocking the trap door gently and sticking his head up slowly. We were pretty sure the walls and doors up there were secure but one could never be too careful, he looked around before crawling the rest of the way up. I followed after him, glad to see they hadn't broken in up here.

I followed him up the next ladder which led to the loft to the window where we could look out over the fields and a bit of the house. I stood next to him at the small window and what I saw made me feel sick, the dead were everywhere, just milling around the little farm. I wondered if they smelled us and were trying to locate the source, or maybe they decided to just stop here. I didn't know and I didn't really care, I just wanted them gone.

"Damn," I heard Daryl whisper. "We're screwed."

"Positive aren't we?" I sarcastically answered, trying to lighten the dark mood but I knew he was right. I stepped back from the window and ran a hand over my face and he turned and leaned against the wall, watching me curiously. "Maybe they'll move on soon." I suggested and he shrugged.

"What if they don't?" He voiced my fear, the one that had been sneaking up behind me. He didn't beat around the bush; he just hit us with it.

"Then I guess that means we really are screwed." I sighed heavily. "We have no food, we will have water unless the pipes freeze, but really we have nothing." I started to pace. It was cold in this barn, but there was a water pump in here, one that you had to do by hand that I was using for water for Hera. It was pretty good water, but every now and then the pipes liked to freeze and it was already pretty cold now, what would happen tonight? We had no food, so that would make things tough but at least we had old musty straw that we could bed down on.

"Rick is going to kill me…" I groaned, still pacing.

"That's not going to matter much if the walkers get you first," he dryly joked then grabbed my arm, stopping me as I continued to stalk back and forth. "We have water, that's the most important thing. I'm sure they'll move on." He said it so convincingly that I could let myself believe him. "And Rick will understand." He added softly. I looked out the window one more time, gosh there were so many of them. I moved across the window and sat on an overturned bucket that was there, I rubbed my fingers at my temples, thinking.

"There are too many to try to make a run for the house, they would see us and with how many there are and the house couldn't stand that amount most likely. And we wouldn't want to do that anyway. Really our only choice is to wait it out." I said but I think it was more for him then me. I understood when I had to be still and wait but him, I don't know how well he would do, he was much more of a have-to-do-something kind of person than I was.

"I guess so," he said and turned to look back out at the depressing sight, forcefully but not too much so that it would be loud, he shoved his hands onto the wood on either sides of the window. Really we both were not the type to sit and twiddle our thumbs but what choice did we have?

I slowly stood, I couldn't tell if he noticed or not, not that it mattered. I backed down the ladder and started to walk, I carefully walked around the walls on the barn, just double checking everything. But what I needed to be more worried about was the floor; it was pretty unstable in some places and the old, loose hay that lay everywhere hid the questionable spots.

I crept around and I could hear them at the sides that were level with the ground, my ears were filled with the sounds of them walking around, limping and stumbling. They were broken and clumsy creatures, most so twisted it was a wonder they could still walk but their drive to eat pushed them, and if they felt pain or not, I really wasn't sure.

I peered through a small crack in-between two pieces of wood and I could see them; wandering about, wearing their usual stupid, blank expressions. Grotesque wounds covered so many of them and their clothing was drenched in blood and other gross gunk, it was disgusting. Suddenly there was one right in front of me, so close I could smell it's rotting flesh, I suppressed a cry of alarm and took a step back, hoping it hadn't seen me. My foot expected to land on a solid floor but instead the hay gave way and I was falling, down through the floor and into one of the empty stalls. My feet hit first and then my butt, my body rang with shock and pain and I couldn't stop the sharp groan that escaped my lips. I pressed my lips together tightly after, grimacing and hoping no one heard that.

"Shit," I swore softly to myself, cursing to myself a lot more in my head. I wanted to yell in frustration and pain, why me? Why was it always me?

"Jem," I heard a gruff whisper come from the floor above.

"Down here," I hissed back.

"Damn, how'd you get there," he smartly commented, looking through the hole.

"Just… Shut up." I growled. He disappeared from sight and then I could hear him coming down the ladder and then he opened the stall door.

"You are trouble," he shook his head, looking at me from the stall doorway.

"Oh I know," I sighed, still feeling a little unsteady from the fall, it was a good distance. I fell back in the straw, content to just lay there and catch my breath.

"Break anything this time?" I picked my head up out of the hay and scowled at him.

"No, thanks for your concern thought." I retorted. I flexed slowly all over and the only place that really seemed to feel the effects of the fall was my butt and my right ankle. I must have fallen on it harder than the other, I could feel it throbbing but it wasn't too bad. I had tripped over my ankle plenty of times before after stretching the tendon when I was younger. It would go away soon enough but I wished I had ice, that always helped with the swelling. He shook his head, probably in disbelief at my clumsiness and turned away. I pushed myself up to my feet and for a few steps babied my ankle until I could gage the pain but it wasn't too bad.

I stumbled out of the stall but did my best to walk as effortlessly as I could toward him, I didn't need him worrying about anything else, anyway I would be fine by tomorrow, I was sure of it.

"I guess that means we won't be making a run for the house for sure," what a smartass he was but I ignored his comment. He stood at Hera's stall door, allowing her to lip at his hand, she was ever hopeful for treats and he seemed to be enjoying it, a half smile pulling at his lips.

"What are we going to do about the hole in the floor?" I asked as he pulled his hand away when I got closer.

"What, so you don't fall through it again?" He teased.

"Very funny," I said dryly, rolling my eyes. "I mean, if somehow the walkers get through up there, we should have that covered." He chewed at his bottom lip in thought, absentmindedly rubbing the brown hairs on his chin.

"That's a good question," he eventually answered and I had a feeling he was stumped. "Well, let's take a look shall we," he lead the way and I followed behind, doing my best to ignore my stupid ankle. When we got up there we stood staring down at the hole for a while, trying to figure out what to do.

"If we just slide… say boards over it, they could pretty easily push them off, accidently or no." I pointed out and he nodded, chewing on his pointer finger.

"Is there anything big and heavy we could just move over it?" He asked and we both looked around. Sadly we had left the cart we hooked Hera up to, down outside under the overhang and there were hay bales but there were just a bit too small to sit over the hole just right.

"There really isn't much up here," I admitted looking around, just a bunch of little stuff, nothing that could cover the hole.

"Why don't we just put a couple boards over it then grab say, three of those hay bales, that's should do it," he suggested and I shrugged in agreement, it would have to do. We found a few boards lying about and we, as quietly as we could, set them down over the hole. Then with him moving ahead of me and grabbed the first, they were good sized bales but I should be able to lift them no problem. It wasn't a problem for my arms but my ankle was screaming, I kept my steps fluid and covered the pain, burying it as deep as I could, but I could feel sweat from the strain sprouting on my brow. I couldn't help but let out a rush of air as I placed it next to the first on the boards and I hoped it would work. Daryl dropped the last in place and brushed himself off.

"That should do it," he said.

"I hope," I muttered and followed him down back to the first level, closing the trap door after us. It was almost impossible to see down there and Daryl pulled out his little flash light he sometimes attached to his bow. I gave Hera more hay then stood for a moment, a little awkwardly, unsure what to do.

"Well, I guess I'll hit the hay," I joked and he cracked a little smile as well as rolled his eyes at my pitiful pun. "Do you think we should have watches through the night?" I asked him.

"I doubt it, they really don't know we are here and even if they did, I'd say we are safe." He shrugged. "But if you want to go look out the little window for half the night or so, be my guest."

"No thanks," I waved my hand as if pushing the idea away. "I'd like to sleep thank you." I felt a shiver run through me, it was starting to get pretty cold and damp in here, which tended to happen in bank barns like this, I would know I used to have one. I went into the stall where I had put the grass hay for Hera and I spread it out making a little bed which I huddled up in it, it was comfy but still chilly.

I rubbed my ungloved hands together to warm them, wishing I would have thought to shove my gloves in my pockets, but I hadn't. I wore about three layers, my shirt, a sweatshirt, and then my new jacket and I had on my thick, good pair of jeans, nice and warm. But the cold was settling into my bones and I couldn't shake it, I couldn't help but think of the nice warm fire in the house, of course I doubt they lit it tonight. I made out the shadow of Daryl standing in the doorway and wondered what he was thinking, maybe he was deciding if he wanted to sleep in the stall with me or go off somewhere else.

"Are you going to join me?" I asked him, my voice was teasingly playful.

"You're a strange one," he commented but his shadow grew larger and I could hear him stepping in the hay. I pushed an armful his way and listened to the sound of him making it comfy, I laid back, but couldn't help but shiver a little, I had a feeling it would be a long night.

"This isn't so bad," I heard his voice over to my left and gave a little smile.

"No, I've got plenty of experience sleeping in barns, it can be quite fun, but it would help if it was a little warmer." The shivers were clear in my voice, now that I stopped moving the cold was creeping in.

"Here," his voice was soft and the sound of movement reached me, I could see the faint shadow of something moving toward me and felt the fabric of his jean jacket brush my fingers. It fell into my hands and I could feel that it was still warm.

"No, you need it, I'll be fine." I tried to give it back but he wouldn't take it. "Daryl really," I insisted.

"I'm fine," his voice was gruff. "I have plenty of layers myself." He left no room for arguments so reluctantly I submitted and covered myself with his jacket. It was a good bit too big for me to wear, and the length of it almost covered all of me when I curled up. I could still feel the warmth of his body on it as it rested on me and the added fabric did help fight the bite of the cold air.

"Thank you," I softly whispered in his direction and heard him give a little grunt in reply then it was quiet. I snuggled up, wrapping myself up in the jacket, trying not to think too hard about our situation. I badly needed a good night's sleep and I hoped I would be blessed with one.

(I apologize for any spelling and grammar errors! I kind of rushed through this one and I am pretty tired, I think another time I will look over it and fix it if there is anything wrong but at this moment I am getting ready for bed. haha! So I really hope you enjoyed it, I am so sorry I won't be able to add a chapter tomorrow, I will be 5 hours away from home and checking out a possible college, fun fun! So wish me luck :D But I think Monday night I should have your chapter, maybe two ;) But I don't want to jump the gun. So please if you liked it review and if you didn't like it review and if you have suggestions or something you think should happen just tell me! I love to hear from my readers! Okay well nighty night guys, I hope to see reviews tomorrow when I wake up!)


	8. Chapter 8

(Home! I'm home! Home sweet home! It was a good trip but I missed home and my horses and fanfiction, duh... even though it was only one day! Haha. And yes, I know I didn't get to update one day but here is chapter 8 today! I know it's late but it is better than never! So I am exhausted, I'm gonna post this and go to sleep forever. Just kidding, I promise I will be up in time to post a new chapter tomorrow! Thanks for reading!)

I woke with a start, sitting straight up, my heart pounding wildly, like an animal that has been caught in a trap. They had almost got me, their long ugly fingers reaching, flesh falling from their bodies as they moved, closing in on me, the lifeless, glossy walker eyes seeing straight through me as they surrounded me, I could sense their hunger and it terrified me. Why I was so scared of them in my nightmares but yet in real life I could stare one in the eyes and then promptly stab it in the skull with relative ease confused me. But there was something about them taking over my sleeping mind that haunted me, whether it was the feeling of helplessness or being usable to run or fight back was what got me. I didn't know, I just knew I hated it, like it was my greatest fear coming to life.

I worked for a little to get my breathing back to normal before I felt that I was being watched. I could just make him out in the morning sunlight that streamed through the cracks in the ceiling and walls. He watched me with weary eyes from where he sat propped up against the stall wall and for a moment I thought I saw concern in them but in a flash it was gone as I looked at him gazing at me. I felt my cheeks flush, it embarrassed me for him to witness me like that, I hated for anyone to see any weaknesses of mine unless I told them myself.

"That was the fourth time you did that," he told me and I knew my surprise was clear on my face. "You had a bad night, didn't you?" But it wasn't much of a question, it was obvious he knew. "All night long you tossed and turned." I felt bad, I must have kept him up and I looked away from him, playing with a strand of straw. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked, his voice was soothing almost, calm and kind, so unlike him.

"Not really," I admitted and he backed down. I shrugged his jacked off my body and handed it to him. The cold morning air rushed to meet me and for a second I wanted to take the jacket back and curl up with it again but I couldn't. I couldn't put my finger on it really but I felt a little weird for some odd reason. With him sitting there watching, having watched me most of the night as well, and the way he was treating me. It was odd. "Thanks again," I quickly said and then stood up, wanting to check on Hera. I found her waiting, her head over the stall door. "I'll get you breakfast in a little," I assured her. I flexed my ankle; it was pretty stiff but not so bad now which was good.

I climbed up the two sets of ladders and looked out into the misty morning, I could see them, dark shapes moving the mist and it sent a chill up my spine. The sun cast a pink hue on the waking world; it would have been a nice day if not for the creatures still wandering around on the property. Thankfully there seemed to be a lot less than the day before, which set alight a little spark of hope in my breast, maybe we would get lucky and they would wander off. I wished there was some way that we could communicate with everyone in the house but I just couldn't think how. I let my forehead rest against the cold glass, the chill actually started to give me a brain freeze which for some reason I found slightly amusing. I could hear him behind me, so when he spoke suddenly next to me I didn't jump.

"How's it looking?" He asked and when I looked over at him he seemed to be his normal self, no longer like that person who had been silently watching me suffer from my nightmares. That person who seemed so willing to hear me out if I wanted to talk about it, that person with the unnerving look of total acceptance and compassion. That person so unlike the Daryl I knew who was strong and realistic and unmoved by emotion.

"A little better, there aren't as many," I straightened up and pushed the loose strands of hair from my eyes.

"Maybe they will clear out enough by tomorrow that we can get to the house," he pondered.

"Hopefully," I answered, the hunger pains in my stomach were growing worse. "We should really drink too, the last think we need is to be hungry and dehydrated." I suggested and he nodded in agreement. So we went down to the first level, I got Hera her hay and more water, then water for us, it was kind of funny drinking from the big buckets but the water was clean and refreshing.

"Oh!" I exclaimed as we sat there on the dirt isle way floor, I did make sure to keep my voice down though, he looked at me curiously. "My saddle bags!" He furrowed his eyebrows and looked at me like I was a little crazy. "I might have some emergency food in my saddle bags," I clarified and he brightened a little.

I hurried to the stall where I kept my gear and started rummaging through my bags, past my summer clothes and things, first aid kits I had put together; there was a supply of foods that would last long enough. I would have to remember to stock up again but thank goodness I had thought ahead so far to stick food in there at all.

I took the food out to him and laid it out; I had two bags of jerky, four cans of fruits, a good sized bag of dried fruits, another of nuts, a loaf of hard traveling bread, I had also gotten a jar of peanut butter that was still good, I loved peanut butter.

"Aren't you a smart one," he commented, looking at the stash hungrily.

"We will ration it out but at least we won't go hungry," I smiled, feeling a lot better. We each had two strips of jerky, and picked at the dried fruit, it tasted so good; I couldn't believe how hungry I felt. "Isn't it interesting," I began then, after we had finished and wrapped everything back up and had sat back in a comfortable silence. "How even though we are safe here, we have water and now food, I can't help but want to escape." He looked at me thoughtfully for a while; it seemed to strike up deep thought in him.

"You like the risk don't you?" He finally asked, looking at me with an almost expressionless face and I thought about that a little.

"Yeah, I guess I do. I like being able to decide my fate, I like to be able to make the wrong choice and learn it myself, I don't like four walls around me for too long." I admitted.

"That makes two of us," he rested his arms on his knees and glanced at me for a moment. Hera watched from her stall, her big amber eyes taking us in, our eyes had adjusted to the dark of the barn and it wasn't so difficult to make thinks out. She was probably wondering why I hadn't taken her out, I was sure she wanted to stretch her legs.

We sat there for a while longer before I couldn't stand it a moment longer and I climbed all the way up to the window again. The light of the day hurt my eyes for a few minutes and when I looked out it wasn't what I had hoped to see, plenty of walkers still wandered around, and from what I could see of the house it looked still.

I sighed and watched a while longer, picking out walkers to follow a little until I got bored. First I watched one that might have been a man. It was tall and lanky, one arm was twisted in the wrong direction and flopped a little as he walked, first he wandered to the side of the house then changed direction to head toward the barn, then just like that he was headed down to the driveway. The second one I watched must have been a young child, I couldn't guess its gender and its clothing wouldn't help give it away, it was covered in gore that dripped from its left shoulder. Its whole left side seemed to have difficultly moving and it had to drag its leg and arm with it. It was obvious the child had been eaten at a little from its shoulder and stomach; I didn't watch that one for long. I quickly grew tired of this game and sickened by it. Each body I watched stumble around suddenly had a story, my brain, who I assume liked working against me, seemed to enjoy devising up the tales of how each person died. Each more horrible and gruesome than the last and it made me sick, I mentally slapped myself and I was glad for the momentary distraction.

They found the chickens. The latch wasn't that strong and with the help of a few of the dead man's friends the door was soon pulled open and at least six walkers got a good meal. Even though I could actually hear it, my brain clearly imagined the sounds of the dying chickens, so loud and clear it was like I was in that little shed with them. It wasn't long before they stumbled out, covered in blood and I felt my heart go out to the poor chickens. They were good to us while they lasted.

When I finally went back down to the bottom floor it was because I was driven by hunger. I guessed it must have been lunch time and now that we had food my stomach wouldn't let me forget it. Daryl sat outside Hera's stall, his back against her door, sharpening his hunting knife.

"I gave her more hay, she kept pestering me," he tried to act like it annoyed him but I saw right through it.

"That's fine," I shrugged. "I'm hungry, how about you?" We had a light little lunch and I sat there, unsure of what to do. I was growing so restless. I finally decided on grooming Hera as Daryl cleaned and sharpened yet another knife.

As I brushed the hay was forgotten, I smoothed my hand over her sleek coat. It was so soft and warm to the touch, my hands were stiff from the cold and it felt good to work them as I pampered her. I could feel the blood rushing to my finger tips and they warmed up quickly. She dozed where she stood, my rhythmic stokes lulling her. I worked until I actually started to break a sweat and when I stopped she looked stunning. Her coat shone with health and her mane and tail were silky and knot free. I exhaled deeply and admired my work for a moment before she stuck her nose in my hand. Her warm breath tickled me and I smiled. She was my joy. I opened the door then and ushered her out, surprising Daryl who seemed confused as why Hera was now wandering the hall.

"She needs to stretch her legs a little and I should clean her stall." I explained and he nodded. Picking her stall took me back, back to when I used to do this for a living. I worked at so many barns it was too many to count but I always loved it, even when I was scooping poop. Just being with the horses made it so worth it, I usually would trade getting paid for a lesson on a Saturday and that's how I learned to ride. Because of those jobs I went to college for Equestrian Studies and I got to learn so much more about horses and my love for them grew tenfold. I ended up getting jobs managing barns and teaching kids to ride. It was a good life, I loved every second of it. I did very well and I was able to pay off my college debt quickly then even help my brother with his debt when he needed me to. But all of that didn't matter anymore.

I had to snap myself out of it and I realized I was done. I pushed the old rusting wheelbarrow back to its spot with the aged pitchfork. When I looked down the aisle the sight made me smile. Daryl sat, cross-legged on the ground and Hera stood next to him, nuzzling his hair. When he saw me look he tried to wipe the smirk off his face but he failed to and I laughed.

"She likes you," I informed him as she lazily lifted her head and looked around at me.

"Wonderful," he seemed to attempt to sound like he didn't care.

"Get used to it; someone is bound to like you once in a while. Although I would be willing to bet it is a rare thing." He made a sour face and I pretended to be innocent, like what I had said was true and it was obvious. But of course it wasn't, I didn't know anyone who didn't like him, he was impressive with his dedication to Rick and the group. He was a fair shot, realistic, thoughtful and all around a decent man, as long as you stayed on his good side.

The dark came quickly and too soon for my liking it was time to bed down again for another night in the barn. I hoped now for his sake that I would sleep soundly this time. It did make me feel horrible that I kept him up. At least it wasn't quiet as cold this night, I curled up in the straw and he wasn't too far away, the sound of his breathing drifted over to me. I could also hear him shifting around a lot and then the sound of something flying toward me filled the air between us. I felt his jacket land on me and I grasped the fabric in my fist.

"Daryl, keep it." He was too kind, in his own twisted way. "I had it last night, you can take it tonight." I tried to reason but he didn't answer. "You are impossible." I growled and heard him snort as I covered myself with it again. "But if we spend another night here, and I am hoping we don't, expect a fight if you try to give it to me again." I warned him.

Well I got my wish. I didn't have a night filled by nightmares; I had a night where sleep just avoided me altogether. I lay staring into the darkness, waiting for sleep to come but it never did. Instead I listened to the sounds of Daryl's breathing turn from awake to sleeping; it was a gentle caressing sound. He didn't snore, thankfully, the sound of the life giving breath leaving and then filling him was such an impressive thing for some reason now. Maybe it was the time of night or it was that I was taking time to appreciate the little things now. But it didn't take long for me to grow weary of staring wide-eyed up toward where I figured the ceiling was.

Softly I sat up, making sure that his breathing stayed even to show that he slept. I shrugged off his jacket and figuring where he was by where his breathing came from and I settled his coat down. I hoped I got it on him. His breathing never changed as I crept from the stall, it took me a little to find Hera in the dark and a little longer to find the latch to her stall. I slipped in with her and for a while just stood with my head buried in her neck, breathing in her comforting smell.

I could feel someone scrutinizing me. I shifted, feeling groggy, my eyes slowly opened as I lifted my head from my arms which rested on my knees. I was in one of the corners of Hera's stall; she was only an arm's length away, resting with me. A hoof propped up and head low. He stood at the door, looking over it at me, a teasing smirk on his face.

"Didn't want to sleep with me huh?" He joked and it was too early and I was too sleepy to fight the blush that kept across my cheeks.

"You snore." I declared even if it was a lie.

"Funny, that's not what the last girl said," he was feeling pretty fresh this morning and my blush quickly turned to annoyance. It was my turn to have a horrible night's sleep where I couldn't sleep, like him last night, although I couldn't said I have had a good night's sleep yet though.

"Would you like to see how hard a can punch again?" I asked him, standing slowly. My joints screamed at the action and my knee popped loudly when I straightened.

"No thank you," he waved a hand.

"Good," I groaned stretching. I took a step and almost tumbled over; my right leg was completely numb, fast asleep. "Damn," I sighed, laughing softly at myself as I grabbed the stall wall for support.

"What?" I could tell he wanted to keep his voice lazy but I could hear the urgency in it, of course my laughing at myself gave away that it wasn't serious.

"My leg… it is asleep." I gave it a wiggle and then squeezed my eyes together. "Ah! Pins and needle," I yelped as they assaulted my limp, making me whimper. I strongly disliked the pins and needle stage of a numb body part. It often happened to my back when I sat for too long and it was the strangest thing ever. I heard him chuckle at me then move off, perhaps for breakfast. I wanted to join him so I was forced to hop since placing even just a toe on the ground was excruciating.

As I slipped from the stall, not as gracefully as usual, Hera nickered behind me and I knew what she wanted. So ignoring the rumbling in my own stomach, I grabbed her grass, stumbling all the way.

"Look at you, just withering away," I lightheartedly teased my mare as she fixed her eyes on the grass in my arms and started to nod her head eagerly. But despite seeming very anxious for her food she also knew that I expected good behavior before she would eat, so as I opened the door and with one shoo of my hand, she backed up and stood absolutely still, waiting.

"Good girl," I crooned and tossed her breakfast in the stall. I found that Daryl had our meal all ready and I was happy that I and the rest of my body was waking up. I was feeling a little less irritable and I had a feeling the food would assist with that as well.

Once more I spent most of the morning up at the window, watching, waiting, and if anything, feeling less positive. It looked like there were more walkers today and it made me groan with frustration. What would we do? Daryl chose not to stand at the window with me and today he stalked around down below, running out of things to keep occupied with, he decided to just keep moving.

All of a sudden I caught movement out of the corner of my eye, it startled me and I pressed my face against the cold glass. They were running, carrying things to the vehicles, I could see them scurrying around, trying to stay unnoticed. It took me about a minute to process what I was seeing and then another to find the ability to react to it.

"Daryl," I tried to keep my voice down as I called to him but I could hear my fear, were they just going to leave us? My mind was racing, my heart pounding a pattern into my breastbone, I heard him climbing the ladder hurriedly behind me.

"What?" He asked, looking ready for anything but I doubted he would be ready for what I was going to tell him.

"They are packing up the cars," I said and he looked at me with disbelief before racing to the window and pressing his face against it to see the house.

(Chapter 8, finished by a sleep deprived and exhausted me, but here and hopefully lacking errors! Sorry for leaving you at a cliff hanger, they are kind of my specialty but tomorrow chapter 9 should be out! So don't worry my lovely readers! Please review if you love this and can't wait for more! And thank you Dixiewinxwrites12 and Nerdy-Tomboy for your reviews! You guys are awesome!


	9. Chapter 9

(I'm getting down to the end of what I already have written! Which means it is time to start adding to this story, so in a few more chapters it might take a little longer for me to get them out, I won't be able to do one every night like I have been. Sorry guys! But for now enjoy chapter 9! p.s. sorry it is a little short!)

"They wouldn't leave us," he tried to reassure me, or himself, either way I knew it didn't work very well. "They are in the vehicles now, they've been spotted." He informed me, staring out the window. I balled my hands into fists, my nails biting into my palms. "They are leaving my bike," he hissed then suddenly he was running over to the ladder, almost jumping down it. "Come on," he cried. I heard the screech of tired and Daryl pushed the little door open to the back of the barn and I was beside him in a heartbeat. The old Chevy sat there and Glenn stared at us with relief.

"Good, you're both alive, get in!" He pushed the door open and Daryl started to step through the door.

"No." My voice stopped everyone, Maggie who was driving and looked for walkers turned to look at me like I was crazy. I could see Daryl was getting ready to grab me so I stepped back into the barn further. "I didn't do all this just so I could leave her," I growled.

"Walkers," Maggie alerted us and Glenn seemed at a loss for words.

"You are incorrigible," Daryl sighed but backed into the barn with me.

"You can't seriously stay, we have to go!" Glenn finally said, breaking from his shock.

"We'll meet you at the town or around there, where ever it is safe." I decided and before Glenn could say no Daryl slammed the door closed. But before he could call me insane or stupid or something else even more lovely, I was running for Hera. I grabbed her tack and climbed in the stall with her. She could sense my fear and panic because she started to get jittery as I tried to saddle her up quickly. I stopped, knowing it was pointless and I took half a second to breathe, trying to calm myself for her sake. It worked a little, enough that I could get her saddled without having to chase her around the stall. In a record time I had her ready and stood at the door waiting for Daryl.

I double checked my bags and was sure I hadn't forgotten anything, although it sucked that I had to leave the grass hay but there was nothing I could do. I climbed up onto her back, kicked my foot free from the stirrup and held out a hand for him. He grasped my hand, jammed his toe in the stirrup and swung up on behind me. She sidestepped uneasily for a moment at the extra weight but thankfully did no more. I wasn't thinking about anything other than our task ahead but I felt when he slipped his arms around my waist and locked his hands together, his body pressing against my back. It sent electricity from the points he touched but I couldn't think about that now, I had to be focused on our escape.

He had unlocked the door so that all I had to do was kick it open from her back and we could run. I turned her, tangled my hands in her mane, and swung with my foot, colliding with the door and after a loud screech it flew open. The sudden bright light blinded all of us and Hera threw her head in the air but I pushed her out the door, blinking rapidly, trying to gain my sight. It came in blurry at first but seconds later I could make out a few shapes of walkers, not too many though, thankfully.

"My bike," I heard Daryl's voice over my shoulder, I could feel his arms squeeze around me as Hera jumped into a crazed gallop and I turned her toward the house. Most of the walkers didn't know what had happened until we were passed them but they would catch on soon enough. I pulled Hera up next to his bike and he launched himself off her back, I waited until I heard the motor start before giving Hera her head again. I could hear his bike thundering behind us but couldn't see him; Hera was booking with no urging from me. I glanced under my arm, like a jockey might in a race, to see him following along behind us. The walkers were disoriented and confused; they shuffled after us a few steps but quickly gave up, this potential meal was too fast, it wasn't worth it.

I could feel Hera starting to tire as we thundered along but I couldn't let her slow, we had to keep going for her and my safety, we had to find the others.

"Just a little further," I gently asked her to keep going, I should have been taking her for long runs every day, she was so out of shape. How did I get so relaxed? How could I forget what was happening, we always had to be ready, how could I fail to remember that? A quarter mile latter I let up on her and her slowly dying gallop turned into a labored canter, she was just throwing her legs in front of her, her sides heaving. Her nostrils were flared as she sucked in air but she knew her job, she knew she couldn't stop and she pushed on. My love for her swelled at the dedication of this beautiful creature, she was so amazing, so dedicated, so awe-inspiring. I heard the rumble of Daryl's bike as he brought himself next to us.

"That's some horse you got," he said, raising his voice over the sound of his motorcycle, I saw Hera look over at it but she didn't have the energy to fear the noisy thing, she just accepted it. I nodded but I found I couldn't speak, I was overwhelmed with thoughts and emotions and fears. It wasn't much longer before I spotted the town and pulled Hera down to a brisk trot, we had no clue what or who was in the town, just hoped it was our people. I hoped it wouldn't be too much to ask Hera to escape if we would need to. I couldn't help but worry that she might not be able to run any longer or might hurt herself trying to. The memories of what might have happened tortured me as we entered the town; my nerves were tense with anticipation, my hand rested on the handle of my ax so that I could be ready for anything. But all we saw was the group, sitting in the center of the town, waiting.

I let Hera walk over, her head dropped low and her breathing was rough, it broke my heart and I swung off her back and walking next to my wonderfully loyal horse. Daryl had turned his bike off and walked along on it next to us, I could feel the tension in the air and I knew Rick was pissed. When we reached him though he stayed silent, I think he knew better than to speak at this moment or maybe he took pity on us. Hera looked exhausted, white foamy sweat covered her chest and neck and her nose almost brushed the ground. I could feel that all of the blood had drained from my face, I felt so weary, my body was shaking uncontrollably and I was just glad to be out of that situation. Daryl parked his bike and stood, but he stood tall, his eyes met Rick's unwavering and he looked so sure of himself, I wondered how he did it, I just didn't have it in me right now.

Finally Rick spoke and his words released the last of my tension. "Clean her up and then we are moving on."

My head rested against the cold window but sleep wouldn't come even though I know I should try. Maggie glanced over at me; I could see the worry written clearly on her face as she drove. I had loaded up Hera carefully, thankfully she seemed okay, just tired, so I set her up with some hay and spent a moment resting against her warm body, thanking her in my mind. I felt so disconnected from everything, watching out the window as unknown, bleak landscape sped past, I was falling apart, how did I get this way? How could I let myself get so weak? We hunkered down in our vehicles for the night and thankfully Hera looked much better the next day, I got lucky, very lucky.

A few days passed but I never felt any better, the unsettling feeling of a conflicted to come never left my gut, these people around me I just couldn't connect with them anymore. I felt like they were all looking at me like I was such a burden on the group, if it wasn't for me things would be easier and faster and I understood that. I couldn't take their looks and I knew they spoke about me behind my back, I knew it. I distanced myself from everyone, especially Daryl and Maggie, I could see that Maggie was worried and maybe even a little hurt but she had Glenn, she would be fine. Daryl though, he watched me, curious, and it made me wonder just how much he was taking in and understanding, but he was Rick's right hand man, he had his place here. Everyone did, except for me.

I unloaded Hera from the trailer, glad she was back to her old self, that sinking, guilty weight on my shoulders eased a little now that she was okay. I hated to think that anything might happen to her, I didn't know what I would do without her.

I stood brushing her as she dozed in the sun; it was so nice to be blessed with a little warmer weather right now. I heard him approach before he spoke up; I turned to face him, noticing he had drawn the attention of a few others who stood back a bit curious; I couldn't help but wonder how this conversation might go.

"Jem," he started and I could tell he knew he was bringing up a touchy topic.

"Yes Rick," I answered, my voice hard and cold, a little colder than I might have liked.

"It-it's… Well it's about Hera." He said and I felt my hand grip my brush tighter. "It's been a bit of a strain with this trailer and her and all, I don't know how much longer we can keep it up," his voice was gentle and he rubbed his hand over his chin, where a graying beard was trying to grow.

"What are you trying to say?" I demanded, my voice was deathly calm but inside my stomach was clenching, making me feel sick.

"I just… I think it would be best if you let her go." There, he said it and I felt my face grow red,

"Let her go?" I echoed and he nodded.

"It just seems to be the best decision. That's what you said you would do with horses you found." He tried to back himself up.

"Best decision for you maybe?" I growled.

"What do you mean?" He asked, placing his hands on his hips, a stern look growing on his face.

"I'm going to give you one more chance here to take it back or change your statement," I set the brush down and crossed my arms over my chest. He seemed surprised, taken aback at what I said, and he gave a little shake of his head.

"I'm not taking it back." I took in a deep breath and saw that everyone had stopped what they were doing and were now watching.

"So you want me to just let her go, send her off on her own, so she can run wild and free? 'Like I did with the other horses?'" He gave an exasperated nodded, obviously growing tired of the circles we were running it. "Why don't I just shoot her in the head now, that would make it easier on me." I spat and they all looked at me like I had gone crazy.

"Don't be so negative," he said in a gentle voice, I had a feeling he thought maybe I was just over reacting, getting upset.

"I'm not being negative, I'm being realistic. A bullet in her skull would be more merciful then letting her go, you should know that. She has been domesticated, she relies on humans to care for her, and if she wasn't attacked by a herd and eaten she would slowly starve or die from other avoidable causes. She doesn't understand how to care for herself like a wild horse. I let the other horses go because I could take them with me, I could care for them and releasing them was a kinder death then leaving them to starve or be cornered and eaten. It was kinder that way. But it isn't the same with Hera, she has me and I have her. We take care of each other. She has something kinder than be released to die. She can live." I explained, trying to keep my voice calm. "And I will not be doing either of those so called 'solutions'." My voice was so calm, so angry but calm it was scary. To think he would even suggest such a thing, it just proved my worries; I was a burden to them. I didn't want that, I felt my face burning at that realization and I wanted to run far away so I didn't have to face them anymore.

"Jem, I just-"

"No, just shut up and stop, please just stop." I couldn't stop myself from finishing with a plea, I just wanted them to go and I knew he understood he messed up. We could get nowhere anymore, he should just go, leave me alone before I said or did something I would regret. My anger, it could get ugly but I usually did my best to hide it, it was rare for someone to see it. I turned away from them all so that I didn't have to look at them any longer; I just wanted them gone. I tangled my fingers in Hera's mane, squeezing my eyes closed; I heard the sound of them slowly moving off, all but one. But he wasn't the most patient type and after so long of waiting for me to turn around again he moved off as well.

I released all the air that I had been holding in my lungs and rested my forehead against Hera's mane, breathing in her relaxing horse smell. If anyone could help me now it would be her. I could feel the anger, the betrayal, and the hurt stirring inside of me. I had held myself together somehow, I really didn't know where I got the strength for that, but I had and it was good. But now, now my emotions were open and raw; I hated them, all of them, how could they do this to me? They weren't my friends, maybe we had spent a few months together fighting walkers, maybe I felt like I knew them and fit in, but that was all a lie. They didn't know me, not at all, nor did they care to, I was just a burden to them. I ground my teeth together in frustration and soaked in the comfort that Hera offered to me, I just wanted it to be her and me again, no others, just us. No stress, no worrying about the truck or gas or the others, we could just go back to how things were. I wanted that now more than anything.

(Oh Jem, forever the self-sufficient, 'I am better on my own' person! But she thought she had to do it to keep Hera safe, so who can blame her? Sorry if there are any typos and such, I haven't been taking as much time to look over these as I should, I am pretty busy with important stuff right now. Like watching the walking dead all over again haha, VERY important! I would like to thank Nerdy-Tomboy for her hilarious reviews, I laughed so hard at the repopulating the earth one, you are a riot! Thanks for reading and look for chapter 10, hopefully coming out tomorrow!)


	10. Chapter 10!

(So this is my favorite and least favorite chapter... Favorite, well you will find that out when you read it, hehe. But least favorite because it felt so disconnected and was really hard to write. I am not sure where I want to go after this, the well had run dry and my head hurts so bad. I think I might take a day off (probably not) and then I will be back, I promise! But if you guys would give me some feedback that would be super awesome and helpful, I am having a MASSIVE brain fart, bleh.)

As the sun rose that morning I seemed to wake with it, had I really just walked away from the good thing that I had going? I couldn't help but wonder if maybe I should have given it one more day. But I shook myself out of it, I made the decision I made because it was the right decision, it was right for Hera and myself, things were just better this way for all of us.

They will be getting up now. They will notice I'm gone about now. They won't care for too long. I couldn't stop myself from thinking those things, I tried to shrug it off but I just couldn't. My mind drifted to Maggie, would she want to find me? Would she not want to leave me behind? Or will Glenn comfort her and then she will just move on?

And then there was Daryl, I didn't want to think about him, I tried to tell my brain not to but it wouldn't stop. I knew he would be fine, he could move on, he was strong like me and I think he would understand my leaving the most which was a plus. And he always had Carol, I knew they had a special relationship after the loss of her daughter, I didn't know exactly what was going on between them and I didn't need to know, it was none of my business. I had a way of putting my worried thoughts about them to ease and hurting myself all at the same time. I felt better to think that they would be fine without me and then at the same time I was bitter because I knew after so long I wouldn't be a thought in their mind anymore, only a memory. I felt the emotions raging in me but I dismissed it, I shoved them all aside and tried so hard to just forget them all.

I looked out at the forest before us, the new places we could go and hopefully no new people, just some walkers. It would feel good to crack a few skulls right about now. I did feel a weight lift off my shoulders, I could breathe again, I was free, we were free. It was just me and Hera again, I made the calls, I didn't have to check with anyone else first. I didn't work by the buddy system, I didn't have to watch some else's back, just Hera's. It was so invigorating, I didn't need them at all and maybe they were just as much a burden to me as I was to them. I wondered how I could have lasted so long.

We trotted along through the trees and I started planning, Hera and I were going to get back into shape starting now. Once we hit a nice stretch I would get my butt working again too. I pulled the ax from its holster and lined it up with a walker up ahead; with a sweep of my weapon I severed its head from its body. I gave a satisfied smile and replaced the ax, I knew this was where I was supposed to be, this was how I liked to live.

The day was cool but not cold, it was perfect for traveling. Hera barely broke a sweat and we had been going for a good while now. I had just finished running and was successfully unable to breathe. Man I was out of shape. I stripped off the soaked sweatpants and shivered at the air chilled the sweat. As fast as I could I wiggled into my jeans, feeling gross as the sweat made them stick, but it was a good gross. Sitting on Hera once more I felt content, even if I was exhausted and out of shape. I was on the road to getting back into shape and I really couldn't be much happier. We were able to cover a lot of ground and for becoming lazy, I was impressed by how well we did today. Lucky for us we stumbled upon an old factory and well it could be lucky or unlucky, I hadn't figured that out just yet.

I left Hera standing ready to flee if we needed to; I grabbed the ax and slowly approached the door closest to me. The building was an elderly red brick one, some windows were broken but they were too small to mean that they admitted walkers. All of the doors on this side of the building were shut tight too, which I took as a good sign. The door was locked with a rusty chain and padlock but a couple blows with the ax fixed that.

I yanked the door open, since it required me to do such, and a musty smell hit me. It was dark inside, the cloudy windows blocking most of the dying light; only the broken ones lit the room. It was a good sized area, closed in by walls and a crooked door at the other end closed me in. It looked like it might have been an office of a sort at one point, a broken down desk in the corner. It was full of boxes and junk but it was enough space for Hera and myself to crash for the night in relative safety. I wanted to explore more but the coming dark was too quick, it wouldn't be safe to in a little, so I just had to make due with a peak out the other door, hanging lopsided. The rest of the building was still and I hoped with all my heart it was empty, I didn't feel like being bothered tonight. I brought Hera in, her hooves echoing though the room as she walked on the concrete floor. I swiftly untacked her, it was crazy how after so long of doing that I didn't have to think anymore, my fingers just worked, they knew what to do. If I were to stop and think about it I would get confused but if I just let my fingers do their thing I would be just fine.

In the finally half hour of light I cut her an armful of tall grass outside the factory and spread out my blanket as she munched. You might think with the calming sound of her chewing and softly snorting here and there I would sleep like a rock but I didn't. My mind was too alive. Sleep would avoid me tonight.

A few days passed and things were going so well, we moved along at a good clip, only stopping to rest and replenish our supplies. Hera seemed to be happier to have a job, to have something to do every day and truthfully I was very happy with it too. We weren't troubled by too many walkers although I did fear another large herd, that was the last thing we needed now but I figured we could outrun them easy. Of course as well as things were going I was dying for meat; I hadn't had any for quite some time so the moment we found something good, we stopped.

I got Hera situated in a small field we found, a barn was attached to it but it was collapsed, no good for spending the night to my dismay, I was going to have to rough it. But she was well off, she had water and some tall grass to munch on, I left her with her things close, just in case, we didn't really have anywhere else to go besides away, so I made sure it wouldn't be too hard to saddle her. I took my bow from the saddle and slung the quiver over my shoulder, it was pretty calm anymore and I hoped we wouldn't have any trouble here. I crept into the woods a ways from the dilapidated barn and started my hunt. I wasn't the best at tracking but I wasn't horrible, I could do it well enough, I tried not to let my mind wander to a certain person who could do it better, fixing it firmly on my task. Find food.

I was so proud of myself when I finally found it. The little doe grazed hungrily on the sparse grass in the clearing of the wood. She wasn't too big but she was big enough for me and that's all that mattered. Within seconds she was down, an arrow through the eye, and I felt my stomach growl just thinking about dinner. I plucked the arrow from the deer, sent a quiet thank-you her way, before starting to gut her. I was pretty far away from my temporary camp but I wasn't going to do this there. That would be suicide. So I did it here and spread everything I didn't want out, making it more incising for the walkers to go away from my camp for the meat than towards it. Although I hoped there would be no walkers around here at all.

I couldn't help but let a sigh of relief escape me when I got back and found Hera safe and sound, untouched and still chowing down on her grass. Leaving the meat where I would cook it I started to gather wood for my fire, it couldn't be too big but it wouldn't be small either. And boy was that doe wonderful, it made me so glad I stopped, and I was left with enough meat to last me a good while. So with a finally satisfied stomach I bedded down for yet another restless night, even though my full belly made me so sleepy I couldn't allow myself to dream too deeply, just in case we had to move suddenly. I guess that was the perk of being in a group, at least you didn't have to do watch all by yourself.

Finally the horizon turned a light shade of pink as the sun started to peak its head over the side of the Earth. It was amazing how much joy that little event could bring and I started to move my frozen joints. It was so cold, I bitterly hated that I couldn't keep the fire going strong through the night, it was just too dangerous to do that. Of course it had to snow a little around midnight too, I couldn't wait for the sun's rays to reach me and warm my aching, cold body. I poked the coals of my fire with a stick, ready to bring them back to life, they release a very small amount of heat but it was enough to keep my hands warm through the night, I had practically sat in it when the night reached its coldest. But I didn't hate the snow, it was a still night, the moon had been bright and the falling, fat snowflakes had been pretty. The silent sound of them hitting the ground was soothing in a way, but I still wished I could have gotten a good night's sleep; I was starting to feel very grumpy. I would have to find a house or barn to crash in, lock it up tight, and do my best to rest.

It fell like forever before the sun was high enough that I could feel a little of its warmth, I moved slowly, letting my body thaw as I grabbed more wood for the fire. I happily dug into my delicious meal from last night, ever more grateful for that deer. I could hear birds chirping and calling to each other in the crisp morning air, and the beauty of this place was peaceful, I wanted to move quickly before a walker or herd ruined it. I wanted to remember this place as a good place so I started to pack and get ready to move on.

I was busy packing my bag feeling weighed down by my wonderful breakfast. My saddle bags were full of nourishment now that would fill my belly for a long time and it made me so happy. I actually had a little smile on my face as I packed, Hera still tearing at the grass in the field looked happy too. We both had reasons to be, with our full bellies and so far hadn't encountered one walker here; it was a good time for us. I was so busy I didn't notice anything, not that I would have anyway, there was nothing to notice really, unless I turned around.

She never gave a sign that anything was amiss and usually she was as good as any watch dog, looking up when she would spot something or someone, she never left anything go unnoticed so that was why I never saw it coming. Never anticipated anything like the hand that suddenly came around me and covered my mouth, in case I screamed or cried out, or the other that wrapped around me and held me tight to keep me from flailing or escaping.

"Don't do something you'd regret," a voice said in my ear and I knew that voice, it made a scowl pull at my lips and my jaw clench. I shoved him off and he let me, knowing I knew who it was and that I wouldn't do anything I'd 'regret' as he put it. I spun around, folding my arms over my chest, feeling a little violated by how he had caught me and I could see he knew that and liked it by the smirk he wore.

"Why did you come after me?" I demanded, trying to kill the little spark of joy that lit up in my chest, since someone had cared enough to find me.

"You are part of the group; you can't just go running off." Daryl informed me; losing that smirk he worse and he grew serious.

"Well maybe I didn't want to be part of the group anymore." I retorted.

"Then why run off in the dead of night, why not just talk to us?" I could see he was trying to keep calm but it wasn't work too well, I could see the fury in his eyes.

"Oh shut up, you know you would do the same thing I did if you had the reason to." I growled and he narrowed his eyes at me, he knew I was right. "You know me well enough to know I'm not going to 'talk it out', I don't need that drama, it was just easier to slip off. I didn't think anyone would miss us anyway."

"You think after everything, you could just run away and not be missed?" He cried, flinging his hand into the air, his anger was growing; I could see that but then so was mine. I wanted a fight, it would feel good to get a little off my chest by shouting it at him.

"Why not? You all were so eager to send Hera off, why not me too?" I retorted, my voice harsh.

"Rick just-it was an idea which you were allowed to say no to. You didn't have to run off, we could have figured something out!" He was yelling now and I was so ready to yell back.

"Well maybe I am better off without all of you slowing me down!"

"You're such a self-centered little bitch aren't you?" He furiously insulted me and I felt my face turn red.

"And you are a pig-headed, son of a bitch, back country hick!" It all happened so fast, his hand flew into the air, ready to strike me. I flinched, I couldn't help it but I still kept my chin high, willing to take the blow, I wouldn't back down from him. But the hit never came, he recoiled, I don't know what from, maybe from my cringe or maybe from the fact that he had actually almost hit me.

"Shut your mouth," he hissed quietly, his hand dropping to his side. His temper was gone and I felt mine settling too but I still didn't back down.

"I will never let Hera go," I whispered.

"You don't have to," he answered, looking me in the eyes again. I could see that he regretted his action, or almost action.

"But Rick, he couldn't make it any more clear that we are a burden to the group. She and I, we are better off on our own and the group is better off without us slowing them down." I turned away from him and looked to Hera; the dun seemed undisturbed by our shouts.

"That's not true," Daryl sighed.

"Don't lie to me to make me feel better," I warned, facing him again.

"It wasn't a lie. You are family now; you earned your place in our group. You're a good shot, you're obviously pretty damn loyal, and when you aren't pissed off, you can actually be nice." I couldn't tell if he was trying to be funny but his words did make me feel a little better, enough for me to allow him a half smile.

"You have such a way with words Daryl," I said it half sarcastically but half meant it too.

"Will you at least thinking about coming back to the group, so that I didn't have to do all that tracking for nothing?"

"I'll think about it," I caved.

"So you wanna share that doe you caught with me?" He daringly asked after a moment's pause and I looked at him, unable to fight the smile that tugged at my lips.

"Of course not," I teased but pulled some out for him. Hungrily he ate them and after they were gone he looked quite satisfied.

"Not bad," he complimented. After that we sat in compatible silence, I looked over at Hera, watching her calm and relaxed movements.

"Um," he started, seeming a little unsure of himself which was something that didn't happen too much.

"Yes?" I urged him.

"Well you see, Rick only gave me a few days to track you down and bring you back. We aren't really safe where we are at and the group needs to move. Now my time is up and they are moving tomorrow around noon, so I hate to rush you but you don't have very long to make your decision, since they are a good bit away." I couldn't help but let out an exasperated sigh, but then what had I expected. This was the way things were these days, it shouldn't be a surprise.

"I see…" I said and could see the apprehension in the way he watched me. "I guess we should get moving then huh?" It seemed to take a moment to register but when it did he cracked a half smile at me.

"Atta girl," he said then stood. Was this the right choice? He came all this way to get me, how could I say no to his face? I wasn't completely decided, I would still consider it as we headed to meet the group. I mean it was obvious Rick wasn't all for coming after me; he only gave Daryl a little time to track me down. I guessed Maggie might have wanted to come with but Glenn stopped her. I wanted to ask about the others but I held back, I wouldn't let myself get filled with false hope.

I walked with him, Hera followed at my shoulder, carrying all our things. He had informed me that he had left his bike behind a while back, when we left the road. He tracked us on food from there and I was impressed at his speed, but he was a pretty darn good tracker. I guess he was very lucky we had stopped for the day, he might have had to turn around without us, or would he?

"I hope no one touched my bike," he grumbled and I could see he was jokingly blaming us if it was.

"That sounds like a personal problem," I retorted.

"But that bike is my best friend, where she goes, I go," he teased, poking fun at Hera and me, but I didn't really take offense to it. I mean it was just Daryl, I knew he didn't mean it, he knew better because I might just punch him again if he did.

"Oh really? Then why did you leave her behind?" I questioned him and he narrowed his eyes at me.

"Because someone decided not to keep following the road."

"Bummer," I suck out my lower lip and pouted at him, poking fun right back at him to which he rolled his eyes at me. It was nice to be with him again, back in human company, able to tease and be teased back. Hera hadn't quite mastered the art of speech yet.

We found his bike, unharmed to his relief and got a good days ride, which wasn't very fun with me on Hera and him riding. He did a lot of doubling back which was no good since he was burning more gas than he was rightfully using but he never really complained. We were even so lucky as to find a place to stay the night, an older barn I remembered passing, it had been the middle of the day, too early to stop for the night then. But now, it was perfect for a good night's sleep.

I got Hera situated and Daryl had his bike parked by the doors, ready to go when necessary. We had an old flashlight we had found and ate a little portion of the deer, not wanting to eat it all so fast, we would make it last. I leaned against my saddle, the pad covering my legs like a little blanket but luckily it wasn't too cold in the barn, not like it was last night.

"You know, you gave everyone a scare when we all woke up to find you gone," his voice was low and his eyes didn't meet mine. He wasn't sitting too far away, leaning against an old bale of hay, resting on a ragged looking blanket he pulled from the saddle bag of his bike.

"Did they now," for some reason that just gave me a lot of satisfaction, to know they missed me and all.

"Especially me," I barely heard him and it made me study him. Did he really mean that?

"Oh." I flatly stated, not really a question or sounding like I knew, just kind of cautiously curious.

"I..." he hesitated looking up at me finally, his blue eyes locking on mine. "I couldn't bear the thought of you away from us, from me, where I couldn't protect you. Who knew if some damn walker was picking at your bones. I've lost too many, I couldn't lose you too." His voice grew deeper and gruffer, cracking with so much emotion, it was overwhelming.

"I can take care of myself," I couldn't help but say, it was just a gut reaction to defend myself that way.

"No you can't," he was staring me dead in the eyes. "You need me." He just stated it so plainly and somehow, I knew it was true. I opened my mouth but no sound came out, the tension between us could have been cut with a knife. I was clueless to everything around us, for once I didn't care so much as to what Hera was doing, for once something else mattered just as much.

"Maybe I don't need you," I started and his brows creased in confusion, as if he couldn't believe I wasn't feeling what he was, but that was a lie, I was.

"What the hell do you mean by that?" He demanded before I could get another word in and he fell back against the bale.

"Shut up and let me finish." He leaned forward once more, as if to hear me better. "Maybe I don't need you… Maybe I want you." I told him and his eyes, the light in them, changed. Then, before either of us could take anything back or forget any of that had happened he made it so unforgettable. His hand reached out and his fingers curled around the back of my head and his lips collided with mine.

We broke apart slowly and he looked suddenly embarrassed. I didn't think I had ever seen him flush and it opened up this whole other side of him. He cleared his throat loudly, breaking the silence and he bit at his lip.

"We should sleep," the rasp of his words informed me of his uncertainty of what had happened and it echoed my own feelings.

"Mhm," I mumbled, no trusting myself to speak. He clicked off the flashlight, flooding us in darkness and I lay down, turning so my back faced him. But my eyes didn't close, I didn't sleep, instead I stared straight ahead into the dark. Eventually my eyes grew accustom to it and I could make out shapes and shadows of the junk in the barn. Still my mind was buzzing, I doubted I would sleep and to my right I could tell that he wasn't sleeping yet either. What did this mean? What did this change? What if I decided I didn't actually want to go back, could I leave again?

(I need sleep... Three early mornings in a row is killing me and now I have one more tomorrow, hello 6am. I strongly dislike you. Haha! Ah, ignore me, I am just being a baby. So seriously, your feedback would be SO awesome guys, review please! Also, if you are on instagram check me out, my name is dixonsriot. I follow back :) Alright cya guys, I will be back soon! Hopefully with a new awesome chapter!)


	11. Sorry guys!

wow guys, I am so sorry! My computer broke and I can't write or get on fan fiction that way! So I finally figured out how to use it on my phone thanks to FloodFeSTer So I might be able to upload a little chapter that I have been scribbling up in notes. But I don't think it will be as good as when I can use my laptop.. Oh well you work with what you got! Anyway, I am so sorry guys, I'll try to be back by the end of the week hopefully! It makes me so upset that I had to keep you all hanging like this! Fingers crossed everyone!


	12. Chapter 11

(I'm back with a new chapter! Yay! It's been killing me not to have a laptop, you have no clue! And with the new season of the walking dead going on, I have been dying to write! It's been inspiring me and frustrating me lately. But I'm sure you all understand that! Damn it, Rick, just tell Daryl about Carol already! Of course the backstory about the Governor is interesting... But moving on! Here is chapter 11!)

The next morning I woke feeling apprehensive. What would happen? How would what occurred between us affect our friendship? Would things change between us? Did he regret it, was he going to ignore me? Of course my brain came up with the worst case scenario. I stirred and the first thing I saw was Hera. Her gentle eyes and beautiful face put my heart as ease.

But as quickly as it stilled, my heart began racing again as I turned to find Daryl. He greeted me with a small smile and finished his breakfast of deer and dried fruit and nuts. I shouldn't have worried, of course nothing would change. He was like me, too fiercely loyal to let something little deter him.  
"Mornin," he mumbled, licking his fingers. I tried to ignore him as he removed every last hint of his meal from his middle finger. I felt slightly uncomfortable because of the things that innocent action did to me.

"Sleep as bad as me?" I asked to distract myself since I noticed the bags under his eyes and figured he must have been awake longer than I had. He grunted and I took that as a yes.

I started eating and the silence draped over us but it wasn't bad. It was comfortable. Of course, even though my mind had been put to rest about him it was still going crazy about whether or not I really did want to rejoin the group.  
That questioned pledged me the rest if the day until I decided I would give it another shot. If it didn't work out then it didn't work out and I would move on. Which meant I couldn't allow myself to get too attached anymore. And that meant to everyone. Of course a glance at Daryl on his motorcycle made me doubt if that would be possible.

I did pick up that he seemed to put a little distance between us, barely enough to be noticeable. I guessed he was just trying to figure it all out. But I mentally slapped myself, I wasn't worrying about that anymore. No matter how much I wished for his strong arms around me, his heart beating beneath my ear, and his lips. Oh his lips, so soft, so sweet, pressing against my own. Filling me with sensations I could never have imagined. Damn it. I just couldn't stop myself from daydreaming a little.

I felt Hera shake her head under me and I could almost hear her laughing at my pathetic thoughts. I cleared my head and almost jumped to see Daryl going along slowly at my side, looking up at me. There was a small smirk of amusement, I guess the fact that I was a million miles away must have been more obvious than I could have wanted. And that's when I realized there was a sappy smile tugging at my lips. Damn it again. I was a mess. How could I let one guy get under my skin so much.

"Enjoy that last thought?" His teasing comment drifted up to me as the grin fell from my face.

"Shut up," I growled but I couldn't think of an excuse, oh what the hell, did I even need one?

"So we are pretty close, only a little longer before we reach the group. Make your decision yet?" I could see him fitting his mask on, trying to look like he didn't care. But the tugging at my heart and the way he seemed to anticipate my response told me he cared a lot and so did I.

"Yes." I responded, hoping it was the right choice. Once I said it there was no taking it back. Was I sure?

"And...?" His lack of patients made me crack a smile.

"I'll stay." I felt my heart sigh in relief yet at the same time a crushing weight fell on my shoulders. Was I really so willing to give up my freedom? "But if someone starts making suggestions about Hera going anywhere without me, I swear I'm out. For good." I threatened but he barely registered it.

"I'm glad you picked that. You belong with us," his feelings toward my choice to stay were clear in the growing gruffness in his voice. As he tried to cover up his joy with a macho show.

I took a deep breath as we started to move again. Growing closer to the people I had only just run away from but a couple days ago. Doubts and confused feelings wrestled for my attention as I swallowed the lump rising in my throat. With every step I grew stiffer and my heart started to pound harder and harder. Under me Hera felt my nerves and she started to prance and shy, growing anxious because of me. I saw Daryl glance back at us and I gulped down a mouthful of air, doing my best to calm down.

I managed to get Hera back to a confident but relaxed gait but even though my body was calm my brain and heart couldn't be. They wouldn't be, no matter how hard I tried.

I knew we were gaining on them rapidly when we got to a spot under tall graceful pines that showed signs of a human presence. The grass was flat where tents had been pitched, a small campfire still smoldered in the center and tire tracks led away from the old camp.

I gulped down my fears and anxieties and urged Hera on. I would be brave, for her. I sat tall, slipping on a hard face, I wouldn't let anyone get the better of me. I was in control, Rick wasn't going to unhinge me anymore, nor would Maggie create a soft spot, and Daryl. He needed to stop getting under my skin. But deep down I could feel it stirring, no matter how much I tried to smother it, the joy at returning to them was a small flame in my stomach. I couldn't deny that I missed them all and I was just a little glad to be returning to them.

By the time the sun started to reach for the earth we had caught up. Daryl hung back a moment, looking up at me with a looked that I knew asked "are you sure?". I nodded jerkily, there was no turned back now. I told Hera to step forward, a second before he moved again. Showing my desire to rejoin the group, before I had time to talk myself out of it. Daryl sped off ahead, following the tire tracks to a small cleaning. Hera and I followed at an even jog. I could see the vehicles parked in the normal circle around camp, the tents were pitched and the form of the group around a small fire. Without hesitation I pushed Hera to an easy lope, why not make a grand entrance?

(I'm sorry it was so short guys... But writing on an iPhone is NOT easy at all! I hope to get working on the next chapter ASAP! But hopeful my laptop will be fixed soon so I can really be back.. But oh well! Thanks to all those who stuck with me, you're the best! Well time to get writing! Cya!)


	13. Chapter 12

(So as an apology for taking so darn long to get this chapter out I made it good and long! I FINALLY got my laptop fixed so... I AM BACK BABY! I missed you all so much and I am soooooo glad to be posting another chapter to this story, gosh this feels good! So enjoy guys!)

They all froze where they stood around Daryl who still sat on his bike. Watching me canter towards them, some faces relieved, others shocked, one tense. Hera slowed and the stopped next to Daryl, who glanced up at me, squinting the closest eye.

"Found her about two days that way," he gestured to where we came from and then shrugged like it was no big deal, suddenly wearing this persona that he didn't care. It would have royally pissed me off if I haven't been distracted first.

"Hera, Jem!" Maggie's voice broke the stream of not so nice things forming in my head that were directed at Daryl. She raced towards us, quickly hugging my mare, giving her cheek a kiss then she was by my side.

"Get down here," she demanded and not a second after my feet connected with the ground she had me in a bone crushing hug.

"How dare you leave like that," she sighed over my shoulder. "How dare you..." I squeezed her back fiercely, not noticing how much I had missed her until this moment.

"I'm sorry," I said lamely.

"You better be," and we released each other. "I missed you and your stubborn, headstrong, annoying way."

"Well gee, I missed you too," I sarcastically drawled but under the sarcasm there was truth and I knew she heard it. She hugged me quickly again, smiling softly.

"I really am glad you are back though," she clarified.

"I know," it wasn't said haughtily, just in a way so that she knew I felt pain in our separation too.

Finally we separated and noticed all the people around us, faces showing how eager they were to welcome me back as well. It was a very warming thing, to have everyone around me, hugging me and saying how they missed me. As Lori held me tight a moment, off to the side a little because of her ever growing belly, she whispered "welcome back home," and I felt my heart swell. Home, maybe these people were home now.

Lastly I faced him and the atmosphere grew tense. I knew he figured I was still angry with him and honestly I was. I could see him bracing for my fury but not backing down; just ready to take it and then dish it back out if he needed to. But after being so lovingly received by everyone, my heart was on too much of a high to fight. So I surprised him by wrapping my arms around his neck. He tensed a moment and then caved, his arms encircling me and I could feel a sigh soften his body.

"I'm sorry," I felt the words slip from my lips before I could even consider saying them. It was so unlike me to apologize like that but I knew it was the right thing to say.

"I'm sorry too," he gruffly answered. We pulled apart and straightened. "I swear I'll never ask you to leave Hera again," he added and I gave him a small smile. He was forgiven and it made me feel a million times better.

A cheer broke out from the group and suddenly I was swamped by people again. They held onto me laughing and being joyful. It was wonderful to have a reason to be happy, at least for a little.

They pulled me to the fire and offered me dinner. Baked beans cooked over the fire, sending a warmth into my stomach and making me grin. A hot dinner was always welcome.

"What was it like out there?" Carl asked, sitting next to me on one of the fold up chairs we kept in the back of Hershel's truck. He had never been out there by himself; he didn't know what it was like to rely solely on oneself to survive. He was too young to know that and I hoped with all my heart he would never know firsthand what it was like.

"Lonely," I answered him truthfully. "Cold, restless," I continued to emphasize my point. "I don't recommend it." I added with a small smirk.

"Then why did you leave us?" His question was predictable enough but the flash of hurt in his eyes told me that it affected him more than I could have thought.

"You know how much I love Hera," I felt my voice drop almost to a whisper.

"I know," he answered.

"Then you already know the answer to your question."

"I told my dad it was a stupid idea, that you would never let Hera go." He knew? Did his dad discuss it with him? Or did he just overhear them talking about it? I stayed quiet, unsure what to say to that but it was nice to know he was on my side then.

"I'm just glad you came back."

That night my dreams took a weird turn. Normally nightmares of loved ones fighting over my spilled intestines or even worse, fighting for a taste of my beloved Hera, haunted me. But tonight it was the past that came calling.

I hung of the rails to the round pen, watching him work. The filly moved effortlessly around the ring. Already growing into her lanky body beautifully, she would be something special that was for sure. He was giving her cues, so subtitle untrained eyes would miss them. The golden filly obviously understood what he wanted but every being in her body was straining to do just the opposite. He asked for her to slow, so she sped up. His body moved forward to cut off her path, telling her to change direction but she just plowed onwards. They had been playing this game for hours but looking at her you couldn't guess. She still moved with a boundless energy, as if she had just entered the pen. But the man in the middle showed just how long it had been. He had stripped off his long sleeved shirt, leaving him in only a white undershirt, causing me to huddle into my jacket a little more, the cool fall breeze tickling my cheek, sending a shiver through my body. But it must have been a relief to him; I could see the shine of sweat on his face and forearms. His eyes were locked on her, his body language remained sure and firm but his annoyance could be seen in his deep frown.

Finally he caved as she thwarted him for only the millionth time. He threw the lunge whip down and ran a hand over his face.

"I give up, you win!" He waved a hand at her and stormed to the round pen gate, just to my right. The filly stopped and thrust her elegant head into the air, as if asking where he was going.

"She is hopeless," he slammed the gate as I jumped down from my perch.

"She is young still, I think you are being too hard on her," I reminded him, matching his steps toward the barn.

"She is crazy. How am I supposed to work with her if she just does that? I gave her three tries and she blew it." His voice was level, it was too calm. He would regret those words later, I knew it, I knew him too well. He was my best friend anyhow.

"So what then? You are just going to get rid of her?" I couldn't believe that he could be even considering it.

"I don't know Jem, what do I do? I'm at a loss right now. Obviously I can't keep her. It's such a shame, she has such perfect lines. Tempest and Apollo have always given us wonderful, even-tempered foals. But I guess there has to be one bad egg." How could he accept defeat so easily?

"I'll buy her." It came out so quickly, I didn't even factor in if I could afford it.

"What?" He seemed as shocked as me but there, he was giving me the chance to back out, would I take it?

"You heard me," my voice was sure and I realized that I was too, this was the right choice.

"Jem, I believe you are as crazy as that filly." He teased but I knew he could see I was serious and I was pretty sure I caught a flicker of admiration in his eyes.

"Yeah well, I'm not willing to give up as easily as some people... John," I retorted and stuck my tongue out at him. It didn't matter if I could afford her, I just couldn't let her go, something drew me to her.

As I stood watching through the bars of the ring I knew I wasn't the only one who felt it. She matched my gaze with her perfect auburn eyes glowing, her ears were trained on me and her nostrils flared to drink in my scent.

"We will show them, won't we Hera?"

I woke with a start, tears pricking at the corners of my eyes and my heart ached deep in my chest. In a way reliving the past so clearly was worse than waking in a cold sweat of a nightmare of a dreamt up present. I couldn't stop the sob that pushed past my lips and I slapped a hand over my mouth.

John. I worked on his families' farm a little after college while I attempted to build my own business. They were wonderful people and he was a terrific trainer. I was honored to call him such a dear friend. But he was dead, gone, in that past life that tried so hard to forget because it didn't exists anymore. I saw the blood, the still bodies with bullet holes in their skulls. I knew he was in a better place; he was the lucky one really, so why did I cry for him still? Did I cry because I found Hera alive and well and that because of her I had to push on, I had to remain in this world of misery and suffering. Was that why these tears ran down my cheeks in silent rivers?

I pushed from my tent, dashing the tears aside with the back of my hands. I just needed to get out of that space, the dream still hung in the air, suffocating me. I stumbled along, not really caring where I was going, I just wanted to clear my mind, which meant I needed to find Hera.

"You better not be running away again, it's only been a few hours," a gruff voice teased me. I took a deep breath, hiding all and any emotions and then I turned.

He stood there, glowing in the moonlight, crossbow propped lazily on a shoulder, a smirk flashing across his lips. Figures he would be on watch tonight, he probably didn't trust me to stick around.

"Yeah, I finally realized sticking staying would mean having to put up with you." I threw back at him, causing him to grunt in amusement.

"You look like hell but damn, you're still fierce." That was a Daryl compliment, an insult and then something that could be praise which just barely outweighed the offence. "But seriously, what are you doing out here? What you need is a good night's sleep." His voice dropped a little, growing raspy, something it did when he got close to showing emotion.

"Couldn't sleep… nightmares," I didn't really feel like elaborating. It sounded lame to tell Daryl I couldn't sleep because I was having bad dreams. Could I sound more like a child?

"Gonna visit Hera?" He mused and I glanced up at him, a smile pulling at one corner of my mouth.

"You so get me," I drawled, letting it come across sarcastic but it was slightly true. He definitely understood me well enough.

"Well don't get any ideas about leaving again," he half threatened.

"I'm not going anywhere Daryl," I said to his retreating back. I couldn't help but wonder about what happened the other night. Was he trying to forget that he kissed me, was he trying to forget what was said? Was it all just to blame on the heat of the moment? I kicked at a twig as I wandered over to Hera. Damn him for making everything so difficult.

Hera did sooth my terror. Her soft chewing mixed with her rhythmic breathing. It was calming. I perched on her back, lying along her, forgetting the bite of the cold night. I only had on worn and abused sweatpants and a light jacket over my long sleeve shirt but I let Hera's heat sink into me, fill me up. Hiding my hands under her mane, where they stayed warm and functional. Her fluffy coat was like silk and it made me think of a comfy blanket. She just stood, her head level, lowering it to grab a mouthful every once and a while, but mostly she just relaxed there. She seemed glad to just spend time with me. I buried my head into her mane, breathing in her rich scent and immediately I felt myself unwind. This was heaven, right here, right now. Next thing I knew the sun was peeking over the trees, waking the world gently.

"Thanks girl," I sighed and reluctantly slid from her back, gave her a hug and kiss then made my way to my tent. The cold air hit me like a brick wall and with a little grunt of surprise; I pulled my jacket tighter around me and ran to change into warmer clothes.

Breakfast was quiet and even after finishing the night on a good note I was still a little grumpy. I pulled on my gloves and found a hole had started to grow on my thumb, allowing the cold right in. Of course they were my only pair of gloves and that hole would succeed in driving me crazy. I couldn't help but absentmindedly rub the spot, that was open to the nippy day, against my palm whenever my right hand was free.

"Glad to see you stuck around," his gravelly voice tickled my ear as he moved past me to grab a helping of the thick oatmeal that Carol had whipped up. It warmed the belly nicely but sadly we didn't have any spices or anything so it was bland but the steam rising from it made every mouthful delicious.

By the time the sun was half way to its highest point in the sky we were packed and on the road. I was back driving the trailer with my darling dun in it, Maggie at my side and Carl tagging along in the back now. Thankfully for us they kept the truck and trailer, although they had to clean it out, they had started using it to store other things. But no one seemed to mind giving it back to Hera, not even Rick. It wasn't a bad place to be again, back behind the wheel of my truck, we certainly moved a lot faster anyhow. I hoped we would find a place to get gas soon though, the truck was about halfway now and that could be a dangerous place to be these days.

Carl and Maggie were in such good spirits today, I couldn't help letting it rub off on me. Not long into the trip we got a game of I spy going. Despite being in the backseat Carl was killing us, of course being the driver I had to watch the road first then play the game. Or at least that was the excuse I used to explain was I was doing so terrible.

We pulled off a few hours before sunset at a little house by the side of the road. I had no idea where we were and I really doubted that anyone really knew. The house must have been a cute one in its day, elderly and had been loved but now it was falling into disrepair, as most buildings were anymore. T-Dog prodded the sign that hung from the side of the house with the butt of his shotgun. He reached up and ripped the vines off that threatened to devour the sign as well as the house.

"This place was an inn at one point," he informed us.

"Well that's good for us," Rick spoke up. "That means more rooms."

"You mean we might get to sleep in beds?" Carol voiced her excitement.

"Let's find out!" I pulled out my hunting knife and bounded up the porch steps, stopping at the door to see who followed. T-Dog was right behind me, then Rick, Glenn, Daryl, Maggie, and Carl. Carol, Beth, and Hershel would wait outside with Lori. I opened the door slowly, peering onto the dark building, my heart racing. Everything seemed relatively untouched, it was weird. I slipped into the hall and made the first right, which after pushing through a swinging door it turned out to be the kitchen. Everyone had split up and I heard someone's footsteps on the stairs which had been a couple steps away from the door to the kitchen.

I immediately checked cabinets and the pantry, ignoring the fridge; it would all be bad anyway. There wasn't much, it wasn't as untouched as I first thought but there were a few things that would come in use later. That was good. I moved through the next door which was the dining area, it was homey, with a long table probably large enough to fit everyone who would be staying at the quaint little inn. I figured the open doorway to my left would go out into the hall under the stairs. So I slid though the next swinging door and found myself in a cute little living room. Big windows looked out over a steep drop, it was pretty and safe, not one walker would be able to break in that way. I was a plus to this building, maybe we could settle here for a little?

Another empty doorway led back to the hall but I wanted to check out the door to my right. I cautiously opened it, careful not to let it squeal. On the other side were a set of stairs, tight and curving, showing the age of the building and helping me fall in love with it a little more. I was a sucker for elderly houses.

I climbed the steep steps and found myself looking down a long hallway, which I figured where the rooms where the guests would stay. I heard a sound from the room closest to me on my right and I lifted my knife, ready to defend myself against any walkers but it was only Glenn. He didn't seem fazed by the fact that I had my knife trained on him because he had his gun locked on me. We both let out sighs of relief.

"It's clear up here," he told me as we lowered our weapons.

"The kitchen, dining room, and living area are clear too."

"This place is cool," Glenn grinned and I nodded in agreement. We regrouped down in the entrance hall. The place was sound, untouched and a cozy place to spend the night. We would definitely keep this one in mind if we ever needed to pick a place to settle down. There were six rooms upstairs and twelve beds, two in each room which meant everyone would have a bed night. Carol ended up with her own room; we offered it to Lori but Lori didn't want to sleep alone so Beth bunked with her. Although, she wasn't the only one alone, I believe that Carl, who was sharing a room with his dad, would be solitary most of the night too. Rick offered to take first watch and knowing him, probably would stop watching. He spent far too many nights up and pacing, I would see him sometimes, when nightmares would wake me. He always looked like a man on a mission, a mission possibly not to sleep. But I struggled to figure him out, he was a hard man and this word had changed him a lot. He was struggling with himself to decide who he was now, he was a good man though and I trusted him. My last thought before sleep took me was of Hera, out in the garden, I hoped she would be safe. Of course she would be though, what was I thinking?

I was tired from last night because I had my first sound sleep in a long time, although I woke up feeling groggy and pretty unrested. But oh well, I could focus on that too much, we had things to do. People chatted happily during breakfast, glad to have a quiet place to spend the night and beds to sleep on. It was a good feeling to sleep on a mattress instead of the ground.

"Rick, we need to get gas for the truck soon," I reminded him as we began to clean up and people dispersed to pack. He glanced at me, dark bags under his eyes confirmed my suspicion that he hardly slept. But I knew better than to suggest he rest while someone else drove, he would never accept that.

"Right, your truck and Hershel's are both getting low; we will aim for one today hopefully."

"Thanks," I said and then we went our separate ways to prepare for the road.

It would be a beautiful day today, the sun was coming out and I could actually feel warmth in its rays, taking away the sting of the winter air. Everyone was enjoying the gift of the rise in the temperate today. Jackets were shed and people laughed and joked as they packed. I couldn't help but throw the thing I had found in the drawer of the dresser by my bed at Maggie when she and Glenn stopped for a quick kiss. It was cute in a way, although it made my heart ache for something I probably wouldn't have.

I couldn't stop myself from searching the area to see where he was. I found him quickly, carrying Lori's bag to Hershel's truck for her. A rare smile flitting across his lips and his bare arms flexed, the asshole was down to his sleeveless shirt today, it wasn't that warm. I tore my gaze away, feeling anger and a little of something else growing in me but I wouldn't try to figure out what it was… mostly because I already knew.

Maggie caught what I threw at her, releasing Glenn's hand as she did and her eyes grew wide with shock and mortification when she saw what it was.

"For later," I said, slyly winking at her.

"Jem you little," she squawked loudly, throwing the condom back at me. "Keep, just in case you need it later!" She retorted.

"As if," I stuck my tongue out at her but I felt pang of longing echo though me. It would be nice to love someone like Maggie and Glenn did, well not just to love someone, but to have them love you back like that. But once more I shoved those stupid thoughts from my head and got back to business.

We were all having fun, a little too much fun really. We didn't notice the first wave until it was too late, not until someone finally looked up and spotted them coming up the road, practically already on us. Not until their cry rang out and jolted people straight out of their good mood.

"Walkers! Damn it, it's a herd!"

(yay for new chapters after tooooooo long of a break! So please harass me in the comments because I missed you all, I don't care if you yell at me for leaving for too long! Because yelling at me only means you missed me too and that's a good thing! So yeah, hope yall liked it! Look for the next chapter, it should be out really soon because I'm not leaving again until this story is finished but I don't see that happening soon! Alrighty, time for bed, night all!)


	14. Chapter 13

(Sorry it took a little long to get this one out. I had to figure out just what I wanted to happen in this story but I was taking the SATs so I was swamped and dead. It took longer than I wanted until I had enough brain power to be inspired by an idea, but here it is. Honestly I am conflicted about this chapter, so your feed back on it would be lovely! Thanks guys!)

I felt an icy hand squeeze my heart as we tried to flee. I reached for my bow, which was usually across my back, ready for anything, but my hand grabbed air. Then I remembered, it sat in the front seat of the truck, waiting for me, and too far away for me to reach it. "Stupid," I growled to myself. "Stupid, stupid." Instead I whipped out my knife and sunk it into the walker who came stumbling toward me, gurgling hungrily. I ripped it from his forehead and he collapsed at my feet, lifeless for real this time.

I looked around at the chaos, trying to gage the situation. Everyone had dropped what they were doing and focused on the safety of the group; Hershel and Beth were working to get Lori to his old Chevy. Daryl, Rick, and T-Dog fought viciously at the front lines while Glenn and Maggie with the help of Carol worked to finish packing quickly. To my left Carl took down a walker and looked over at me then at the guys.

"Help me get Hera into the trailer," I half demanded but I knew he wouldn't refuse. She was in a panic, snorting and pawing, working herself up into a sweat. Her skin twitched and I knew she wanted to bolt, she wanted to flee and leave the scary things far behind but she stayed for me. She was the best horse ever.

"Hey girl," I crooned to her, her amber eyes locked on my blue ones and she stopped shaking. "Let's get you trailered girl," I suggested and grabbed her halter, she kept her head high and nose flared but she never pulled back. Carl stood at her other side, just in case a walker got too close or she would suddenly decide to bolt. "I'm so proud of you. You're my good girl, my good brave girl," I babbled but it calmed her. We got her to the trailer and she balked for a moment then trusted me enough again to follow me on. We closed her up tight and safe. Now we just needed to make sure everyone could get to their rides safely too.

"Let's help the guys," I informed him, seeing that they were struggling to hold the walkers back. We were so unprepared, so we had to use what we had and for most of us that wasn't much. "Keep the herd at bay until we are ready to take off." He nodded and we jogged forward, taking down walkers as we went. We formed a bit of a half circle, protecting the cars and the people working quickly around them. It was amazing how without saying anything we all figured out our jobs; we were a family, that was for sure. We were starting to get pushed back though, there were just too many, it was terrifying. Every time I cut one down two more seemed to take its place and it wouldn't be long before they would get around us and then we would be in serious trouble. Sweat dribbled down my face even in the coolness of the winter day. I slashed with my knife, sometimes having to retort to kicking them back or pushing them away to give me a moment to prepare to attack again. Next to me Carl seemed to be having trouble to because he kept inching closer to me. The sleeves and front of my jacket were slick with blood and gore, I could feel it splashing my face, but I didn't have time to care. How much longer would we have to do this, I didn't know how much more we could take.

"Let's go!" Glenn's voice reached us and glancing quickly between each other we turned and fled. The dead stumbled after us, groaning their protests that their potential meal was too fast. Suddenly I heard his cry and I spun around, we all did.

"No! Go!" T-Dog hollered to us, a walker had grabbed his leg and they swarmed over him, hitting him in a wave, swallowing him up. He yelled in pain one last time before the walkers pushed forward once more. I felt tears pricking at the corners of my eyes and someone screamed but there was nothing we could do, he was already gone and we had to go or we would be gone too. I pushed Carl ahead of me, aiming for the truck, we were so close. He ripped open the door behind the driver seat and I practically threw him in, slamming the door behind him.

I was in the truck and had it started in a second flat, looking around to make sure that everyone else had made it to their vehicles. Daryl tore off on his motorcycle, leading the way, Hershel followed in the truck and then Rick in the Hyundai. I searched one more time but we left no one behind, I gently accelerated, so I wouldn't disturb Hera behind us.

We sped away from the growing herd, silent tears sliding down my cheeks. I heard Carl crawl up to the passenger seat, his soft, smooth fingers pull my right hand off the steering wheel and he held it in his. It was comforting. I gave him a watery smile and he returned it, the sorrow he felt, that we both felt, was clear in his eyes.

We drove for a few hours before we finally stopped, deciding that was far enough but I think we were trying to out run our heartbreak more than anything. We gathered around a little fire, eating a dinner that was drowning in our tears. Some people cried openly, some tried to hide the tears, others hid their grief altogether. As we sat in that circle, mourning in silence, I realized just how attached I really was to this group.

"T-Dog was a good man and he died honorably," Hershel spoke up, disturbing the quiet which was only broken here and there by a whimper or saddened sigh.

"He died a hero," Carol's small voice followed his, shaking with her pain.

"He will be greatly missed," Beth added. Suddenly everyone opened up and celebrated T-Dog's life, all but Glenn, who remained silent obviously very hurt by the loss of T-Dog, and Rick who was doing watch.

"He was a tough son of a bitch," Daryl finished gruffly before stalking off. We all dispersed to sleep, I felt better after remembering T-Dog like that, and I was ready to rest, that was for sure. My eye lids threatened to fall every second and it took too much energy to keep them open, so I called it a day, a long, stressful, and emotionally taxing day.

It felt like it was way too soon when Glenn came calling for me outside of my tent. Groggily I dressed warmly and entered the early morning air. He stood there, staring into the night, misery written clearly on his face.

"Your turn for watch," he blandly told me, he looked exhausted. "I didn't see anything." He was trying to stay strong, I knew that he and T-Dog were close, they were very good friends. I had heard that T-Dog had picked up Glenn along with a group of elderly people when the outbreak hit. It must have been so hard for him to have to let him go that way; it was hard for all of us really.

"Glenn," I called after him as he turned away, he stopped and glanced back over his shoulder, his eyes empty.

"I am so sorry," I felt my heart crying for him. His shoulders dropped and he finally caved under the burden of being so brave.

"He didn't deserve to die that way," his words were choppy with emotion and the tears fell freely.

"Oh Glenn," I hesitated only a moment before I wrapped my arms around him, softly rubbing his back as he cried into my shoulder.

"He was too good a man to be eaten by those damned things. It should have been me," he finished.

"Glenn, he died for us, he died for his family. It was an honorable death and I don't think he would have it any other way." I tried to comfort him but it was lame. "I miss him too, a lot; he was so good to us. It wasn't fair that those abominations got to take him away from us. But then I know how selfish I am being by wishing he was still here. He is safe now, he is happy and free of suffering, he is in a better place. He deserved that, to be free of this misery." I felt my own pain ease as I spoke and when I fell silent Glenn had stopped crying. I released him and he hastily wiped at his face.

"Thanks Jem," he gave me a heartfelt smile. "You have a way with words, thank you."

"Any time Glenn." I returned his smile and then bid him goodnight.

It was cold and it bit at my nose and cheeks; I huddled deeper into my jacket and wiggled my toes in my boots. This would be a long watch. I quickly stopped at Hera to give her a quick kiss on my way over to the post. She was back to her usual self now, calmly cropping the grass around camp. You would never know she was that horse from the afternoon, quivering in her skin, scared of her own shadow. She was my calm, collected, Hera again, steady and wonderful. She sniffed my face a moment, warming my cheeks with her version of a kiss and I smiled. I gave her a scratch before heading to my post in the bed of my truck, elevated a little but a nice flat surface at the same time. It made sense.

It was boring and so cold; Rick stalked around the perimeter, probably too paranoid to sleep. I was sure he probably thought he failed us, letting us get so relaxed, being so unprepared. He was wrong of course but as the leader of this group he seemed to think he was solely responsible for every burden. It was killing him and destroying his relationship with Lori and Carl. I hoped he would be able to pull it together soon, for the sake of his family.

I played with my bow as I sat, aiming and pretending to shoot invisible foes in the dark tree line. Praying I wouldn't actually have to use it at the same time. I had taken aim and squinted, imagining my enemy clearly when his voice made me jump.

"Careful you don't shoot someone," he warned, his voice teasing.

"Like you?" I commented turning to point the arrow at his chest as I relaxed it. He stood by the side of the truck, an elbow resting lazily on the side, looking up at me with his cool blue eyes.

"What are you doing up?" I asked, resting my bow back in my lap. He ought to be sleeping; he needed the rest as badly as everyone else, which was incredibly obvious by the deep bags under his eyes.

"Couldn't sleep," he curtly answered.

I snorted, "Like how Rick can't sleep." I pointed out as he passed back, walking the perimeter. He narrowed his eyes at me and I could hear the low, loyal growl starting in his throat. "He carries too much weight on his shoulders; too much that he doesn't need to. He is only hurting himself," I watched Rick's jerky movements as he pushed himself in over the deep end.

"He has his reasons," Daryl defended him but his growl silenced.

"I know, I am just worried, that's all." We were quiet for a while and he jumped up in the bed with me, sitting on the side and resting his back against the cab of the truck. He crossed his arms over his chest and got comfortable. I was glad for his presence, it comforted me, I wished it didn't but it did. We sat in compatible silence for a while before I felt them. I could feel the words pressing on my tongue, I didn't want to say them, but at the same time I wanted to have the conversation with him so bad that I couldn't stop them from rolling out.

"Daryl," I started hesitantly. He grunted to show he had heard, turning his eyes toward me. I felt myself squirm under his gaze, my stomach knotted and flipped and made me feel nauseous, it was a horribly wonderful feeling. "What is the deal with us?" There, I said it.

"Huh?" He looked flustered. That's right, Daryl looked flustered and trust me I am as surprised as you.

"You kissed me and now you act like it never happened." He shifted, seeming nervous and it took a while before he spoke, his eyes looked everywhere but at me.

"I don't know what the _deal _is," his voice was so low. "Does there have to be something because of it?"

"Either there is or there isn't, and right now I'm wondering what it is because you started something with that kiss." I clarified and he bit his lip. "What is it Daryl? I feel like you want to go on as if it never happened but those things you said before, I thought you meant them. What happened? Why did you change your mind? Do you really feel that way about me or not? I am done waiting, I am done wondering, I need an answer." Yes I was badgering him but everything I said was true and I was tired of waiting. Either we were or we weren't. If we were that would be wonderful but if not I would live. His face grew dark and I could tell he didn't enjoy what I was saying.

"Do we really have to talk about this now?" His voice was low and threatening.

"If not now than when?" I hissed. "Just keep pushing it off Daryl." I accused. He sat forward, his growing rage clear on his face.

"I don't know! Hell, T-Dog just died! Is now really smart?" He demanded.

"Now is all the better," I countered. "I'd rather not die alone." He let out a rush of air, recoiling for a moment.

"I don't think it would be wise," he seemed to decide.

"Fuck you," I spat at him, jumping to my feet, clenching my bow so hard my knuckles turned white.

"What the hell's your problem," he remained seated but tensed.

"You played me you bastard. You were just leading me on. I shouldn't have trusted you; I should never have believed a word your lying ass said." I cursed him and he stood glaring daggers at me. I had to quickly turn away to hide the tears that sprouted in my eyes, damn them. Damn me for falling for him. I felt a jolt of shock run up my arm as his hand caught my elbow, pulling me back around. I dropped my eyes, not wanting to meet his cold ones, and braced myself for an attack, words or fists, whatever, I didn't care anymore. What I didn't expect was his lips to not form words against me but instead press against mine. Sweet, warm, loving, something I never thought he was truly capable of portraying. His rough thumb brushed my cheek, wiping away the tear that had slipped free and had started a lonely track down my cheek.

"I'm just afraid that getting so close to you will only make losing you all the harder." His gruff voice tickled my cheek and I drew in a shaking breath, staring deep into his calm blue eyes.

"That's the risk of loving," I whispered back, noticing I had dropped my bow and had the front of his leather jacket captured in my hands.

"Damn it." He complained but leaned back in, his warm lips pressed against mine and I took that as a yes to us. Kissing him was better than I remembered and I never wanted to stop but sooner or later we would have to come up for air. When we surfaced we were gasping and breathless but he swooped in again, mercilessly devouring my lips. It was glorious and I couldn't stop myself from smiling.

"How the hell do you do this to me?" He demanded, grabbing my face, forcing me to look him in the eyes as he stopped his attack and kissed me slowly.

"I could ask you the same thing," I chuckled, mostly because of his beard and mustache which tickled my lip and chin. He allowed a smirk to pull at his lips. "Now can you do me a favor?" I asked him, releasing my hold on his jacket and brushing a strand of dark brown hair off his brow.

"Shoot," he purred and I could feel the rumble of his voice shake his chest. Being so close to him was exhilarating, his musky, manly smell swarmed my senses and I breathed him in deeply. The strength of his arms encircling me comforted me like nothing else, I was safe.

"Don't act like this never happened," I let my blue eye staring mercilessly into his and he met my gaze fearlessly.

"Never." There, he said it and I could feel a weight, the weight of the world, lift of my shoulders.

"Good, now do me another favor-"

"How many favors am I doing you woman?" He demanded before I could finish, feigning impatience.

"Just one more," and I paused for dramatic effect, causing him to groan in anticipation. "Go rest, you need to sleep." I gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek and a little push away with my free hand, which he brushed aside, one hand grabbed mine as it fell from his face and the other had me around the back of my neck keeping me from slipped away. His lips started soft then the kiss deepened, growing more passionate, it had my whole body buzzing as I was hypnotized by him, pressed against me, as if we couldn't get close enough. Then it became gentle again, as we both prepared to separate.

"Fine," he released me and I felt my head swim, I needed to regain control and I would only find that in his absence. I watched him until he was swallowed by the night and I settled down for my two hour shift, which now only had a half hour left. I was okay with the lengthy distraction though, it kept away the chill of the night and the boredom of staring into the dark. My heart still raced and I expected to wake up at any moment, that couldn't have been but a dream, it was too good to be true.

I heard my watch beep as my lookout time was over and with a sigh I stood, stretching my back and legs quickly before moving away to wake Carol and then hurry back to my warm tent and sleeping bag. They were luxuries, sleeping bags, and I was thankfully every night for it. It helped to keep the chill away in the dead of the night. If it got too cold though we could always sleep in the vehicles, of course we were doing pretty well now. I snuggled deep into its fluffy depths and couldn't help but wonder what would happen tomorrow.

I woke and was confused, it was still pretty dark, but my internal clock was usually never off. I woke just before sunrise every morning consistently but it was far too dark to be morning now. And silent, it was so quiet, a certain type of quiet that could only mean one thing. I stepped out of the tent to see my suspicion was confirmed, it was snowing. Big fat heavy flakes and they were laying too. The sky was heavy with the snow, which showed this might last for a while, and the snow was starting to accumulate quickly too.

"Snow," I breathed, smiling at Maggie.

"Sucks we can't sled," she retorted, grinning back.

"I know what we can do…" I smirked evilly and before she could catch on scooped up a handful of snow and smacked her shoulder with the frosty ball. I took off, not waiting to see what she would do but I heard her cry and then the crunch of her feet as she ran after me. I was laughing too hard to get very far quickly and I glanced behind me to see her gaining on me.

"Oh God!" I cried, breathless because of my giggles. She plowed into me, knocking me into a pile of snow and we both rolled on our backs, filling the morning air with our laughter. I could hear others chuckling at us too, glad for a break in the heavy mood, a little goofing off could be a good thing. I stood and offered her and hand, which she accepted and we brushed ourselves off.

"That was fun," I admitted.

"Hell yes it was," she pushed her now wet hair back and grinned at me.

After that the bland oatmeal was glorious, warming my stomach and frozen fingers, it was nice. We probably should look for a place to hunker down while it snowed; I could only imagine if it got deep enough it was slow the walkers a lot. Maybe they would even freeze. That would be nice. Rick echoed my thoughts as we got ready to pack up, saying we would look to rest a few days somewhere while this storm went about its business. We packed quickly, I was happy to put more distance between us and those walkers. Hera looked so cute standing there, covered in a blanket of white. I couldn't help but wish that I could get an actual blanket for her, to keep the snow and rain off but that was wishful thinking, anyway, she was going in the trailer. Hopefully the going wouldn't be too rough.

We emptied the last of the gas we had with us into the vehicles and crossed our fingers; we needed it to be enough. I noticed Daryl parked his bike in the trailer, on the other side of the divider next to Hera. He wouldn't be driving his motorcycle in this snow; I hoped he would be riding with me. I felt my heart leap when he climbed into the passenger seat. And it would be just us; between the three vehicles we ended up having the truck to ourselves.

"Isn't this a bit big for you?" He teased.

"If you can't handle it, you can ride in the little Hyundai." I threw back at him and he smirked at me.

"When you need me to, I'll drive," he made it sound like an insult somehow and I stuck my tongue out at him, unable to think of what to say. I started the truck up with a roar, letting it warm up.

"Such a beautiful sound," I sighed. "I always wanted a truck like this, but I never got enough of a career started to afford one." I admitted and he gave a pitying grunt.

"Got any good music?" He asked and started to rummage through the truck.

"Hell, I don't know, I never cared to look." I shrugged. Our small train of cars started to move and with a groan my truck followed, crunching over the snow, which grew deeper by the minute. I hoped we would find shelter quickly, we would need it.

(Thanks for reading! Please leave me some feedback on this chapter, I LOVE reviews :D I don't know if any of you guys noticed but I have another story out called Remember Who The Enemy Is, its about the walking dead as well, it would be so awesome if you could check it out!)


	15. Chapter 14

(Yay for a new chapter! i feel bad it took me so long to get it out, but in case you guys didn't know, my computer screen is cracked :/ It got stepped on so now there are a bunch of lines running across my screen and a HUGE ass crack down the right side. Ugh, I just got my computer fixed too! but I guess it is just meant to be broken or something, oh well I still got this chapter out! Better at all then never right? So anyway, enjoy and thanks for hanging on with me!)

Turns out there were some CDs hiding in the glove compartment, probably over twenty of them in a little case thing. I could hear the heavy pages flipping as he riffled through it, searching for something good, he huffed occasionally.

"Damn this dude had terrible taste in music." He growled but then smiled. "At least he had something good. He slid the CD in music started to pour through the speakers, filling the silence and drowning out the crunch of the snow under my tires. "Ah, Motorhead," he sighed. "Never thought I'd hear them again."

"I thought you were a redneck?" I couldn't help but tease. "Aren't you supposed to like country," and with that I earned a glare.

"Shut your mouth," but it was obvious he didn't really mean it by the way he smirked at me. He liked to be teased, I could see it. We rode in compatible silence for a while before we finally stopped. It was about time, I was getting stiff and the right side of my butt was asleep from all the driving.

"Shit…" I growled as I shut the truck off.

"Huh?" Daryl hummed questioningly.

"I'm low on gas again."

We found ourselves sitting outside of what must have been a shopping center, possibly a Walmart. But it had thick walls and no windows as well as supplies inside, at least we hoped so anyway.

"I wish we could have found one of these sooner," Maggie admitted as we all came to stand in front of the building. The parking lot was deserted and the doors looked to be shut pretty tight. I saw Maggie sneak a glance at Daryl, who came to stand pretty close by my side and then she smirked slyly at me. I couldn't help but shoot her a dirty look but our silent conversation was cut off by Rick.

"Depending on how many walkers are in here, this could be a good spot to rest for a little. There will be clothes and food and supplies, at least I hope so. We will have to be quick, efficient and smart, no more thoughtless mistakes. Arm yourselves well and watch each other's backs. It is a large store, so let's try to keep close. If you come across too many don't try to beat them, just holler a few times and regroup back at the door." He stood in front of us at the doors, he looked grim and deep purple bags hung under his eyes, he was exhausted. This would be so good for him if we could claim this store, at least for a little.

"Be safe." He finished and with that we gathered around the vehicles, making sure everyone had plenty of weapons. I had my large hunting knife strapped to my right thigh, a gun on my other, but guns were only for emergencies. There was a large machete in my hand and my bow was over my shoulder with my arrows, ready for use. Next to me Daryl had his trusty crossbow in hand, a hunting knife much like mine hanging from his belt, and a large gun slung behind him. All around us everyone prepared with silent but deadly weapons, axes, hammers, knives, bats, crowbars, you name it we probably had it.

Daryl and Rick pry one of the sets of doors open and the stall air rushes out to greet us. I took in a deep breath and glanced at Daryl, he nodded his head to me and I knew he was wishing me luck. Of course I knew he would be watching, he would be there if I needed him, he was good at that.

Maggie and I followed Rick, Daryl and Glenn in, leaving Hershel with Lori. It had taken a lot of arguing of Carl with his mom but she finally caved and let him go in with us, but I knew she wasn't happy about it. I had stopped by her side and told her I would watch out for him, and I could see the relief clear in her eyes.

"Thank you Jem," she sighed and I gave her a small smile.

It was hazy inside the store, not too dark thanks to the many sky lights overhead; we dispersed, spreading out in the large space. Maggie and I took a left, heading towards the heath and pharmacy section.

"Spill." She demanded as soon as we were far enough away from the others.

"Now? Really?" I whined, giving her a pathetic look, which was pretty much all she needed to know that there was something going on.

"Fine but you're not getting off that easily later; I want to hear all about it." We split for a moment, going down different aisles, obviously it wasn't untouched, things were missing from shelves, pushed onto the floor, and over in the corner was a body but it was long gone. Starved or had sustained some head injury, but a quick whack to its leg didn't wake it so I dismissed it. When we got to the back, where the home and garden section was we worked together to pull the heavy security, screen doors in front of the glass sliding doors, just to be safe.

"We moved toward the back of the store now, to the auto section. We encountered a couple walkers but they were all weak and frail from being stuck in here and they were hardly a problem at all. We secured a couple more emergency exits and all seemed to be going smoothly. Wishful thinking.

I heard it echoing through the building, someone was hollering, that meant walkers, and lots of them. Maggie and I exchanged worried looks before we ran for the entrance. I could hear more feet, from behind the next aisle over and I got my machete ready but it was only Daryl. His eyes showed his mollification that I was alright.

"What's going on?" I asked him as we made our way to the front together.

"I don't know." He grumbled, growing stern again. When we got there we found Rick, Carl, Beth, and Carol. But no Glenn, I saw Maggie's face drain of color and she bit her lip in anticipation.

"I'm sure he is fine," I tried to reassure her and she nodded but didn't look very convinced. We all exhaled loudly when he skidded to a stop in front of us, messy with gore and missing the ax he had carried in.

"Glenn, what is?" Rick demanded as Maggie rushed forward to hug him quickly, glad to see he was okay.

"In the back, I looked to see what was there and about a lot of them were just milling around back there. They swarmed the door before I could barricade it." He was breathless and frightened. Everyone drooped a little; this could have been a good place. Was it worth it?

"So we are just going to give up? Like that?" Carl spoke up, surprising us all, especially his dad. "Is this place really so easy to give up?" He wasn't just an ignorant kid anymore and I could help but be proud of him. Rick stopped staring at his son with amazement clear in his eyes and maybe even a hint of respect.

"What do you guys say?" Rick's eye danced across all of our faces.

"I say we kick some flesh eater ass." I spoke up and brought some careful smiles to people's faces.

"It's too good to just give it up," Maggie echoed my thoughts.

"I'm with Jem and Maggie," Glenn said and I saw him grab Maggie's hand, giving it a squeeze.

"Hell, why not?" Daryl grunted and Carl nodded the whole time, as if he knew we couldn't back down without a good fight.

"I'm fine with getting my hands a little dirty," Carol shrugged.

"Let's do it," Beth fixed her grip on her machete.

"Alright, it is settled then. Beth, go update Hershel and Lori," the way he said his wife's name, it was sad, he spoke quickly, as if to get it out and then keep going so he didn't have to think about her too long. "Tell them to be ready to run if we need to. And you stay out there; I think we can handle this without you." She nodded and jogged out to tell them, while she did Rick turned back to the group. "Stay tight, no one runs off, we have to be serious about this. Carl, go wait outside." I could see Carl's face fall.

"But dad…" He cried and I couldn't stop my heart from aching with him.

"But nothing, this is too dangerous," Rick was stern and I couldn't help but agree. I couldn't stand to see Carl get hurt. "Please." His father added and with a crestfallen look Carl left, joining Beth, Hershel, and Lori.

"Ready?" Rick asked us.

"Let's do this," Maggie snarled.

We moved down the aisle together, as a group. Daryl eased up next to me as we went and I felt his hand brush mine, it wasn't much but it was huge from Daryl. It was such a simple gesture yet it made my heart constrict and I couldn't stop myself from smiling at him. He returned the smile quickly, just in case someone might see his new weakness, me, then we both focused on the task ahead and my fingers slid from his reluctantly.

The aisle made like a funnel and they could only come at us in waves of three or four, so we split up. Rick, Maggie, and Glenn took one aisle and Daryl, Carol, and I took another. We positioned Carol in the middle, so if she struggled with a walker, Daryl or I could help her from either side. It wasn't that she was weak but she wasn't always the best at killing them. She lacked the confidence most of the time and second guessed herself which made her blows less effective, although she was a half decent fighter she just lacked knowledge and practice.

That and it was absolutely terrifying trying to push back the hordes of walkers that swarmed out of the back of the store, so it was comforting to have backup close by. All we needed to do was close to the door so we could save them for another time; we were exhausted and needed to rest before we faced them again. That was if we could even get to the door anyway.

I grunted with the strain as I chopped another walker in the head and disposed it at my feet, inching forward another step. They were starting to build up around us, I wasn't looking forward to cleaning it later but I was sure we could just drive the truck in here or something, with this whole store at our disposal, it would be much easier.

I heard Carol let out a sound of distress and after shoving my machete straight into the face of the walker before me and holding it up as a shield against the others, I used my hunting knife to stab Carol's walker in the back of the head. It fell at her shoes and she gave me a nod of thanks. I shoved the walker at the end of my long weapon into the rotting corpses behind it to give me a moment to clean my knife in two strokes across my leg and shove it back into its sheath at my thigh.

I glanced over a Daryl to see how he was doing and I was relieved to see we were making progress. Barely but some improvement is better than none at all, or better yet, being unable to hold our ground. I rushed forward; knocking back a couple charging flesh eaters and gaining even more on them. Soon we would be out of the aisle and into a hall, where more walkers would be able to get at us, but they were still funneling out of the back slowly, I believed we had a good chance of winning this war.

There was something unbelievably attractive in watching Daryl destroy corpses. Maybe that was sick and disturbing but his skill and efficiency at dealing with the walkers was captivating. But then there was his strength and his face which had me completely enraptured as well. He wore a look of grim determination, such concentration and dedication to kill these walkers for the group; he could be so loyal and dependable. I could hardly see his bright blue eyes in this lighting, mostly because he had them squinted as he slashed and buried his knife into walkers. Little flecks of blood decorated his cheeks and forehead, and sweat trickled down from his temple. For some reason I felt my heart leap into my throat, everything about him making my brain buzz. What was so appealing about it to me, seductive almost, I didn't know but I did know I was so glad he was mine. A hungry growl brought me back to reality quickly and I focused on our goal once more, the doors, close the doors.

I could see Carol was falling behind as I struggled forward even more but she had Daryl close to her, so I let her slip from my mind. I focused only on the walkers blocking me from the doors. I broke from the aisle way and took out two more corpses cursorily, Daryl and Carol hurried to keep up and watch my back, the walkers were almost all around me now and I felt my adrenaline spike. I spotted Glenn, Rick, and Maggie next to us, making their way slowly out of their own aisle and I gave them a triumphant smile before tuning out the rest of the world again.

With a mighty warlike cry I rammed right into the walker in front of me, after breaking its jaw so it couldn't work its mouth and cleaving off both arms with two potent slashes. It saved me while I pushed against it, he couldn't bite or scratch me but his body protected me. By doing that I earned myself a huge step forward, I was a little over half way across the hall and closest to the doors. Embracing the last of the adrenaline rush I had, I starting throwing walkers to the sides and slammed into the doors, closing them on a hand. It wiggled as I strained to hold them shut but it wasn't the hand I was worried about.

The walkers recovered rapidly after my sudden movements and they advanced on me. I desperately looked for something to hold the door secure so I could finish off the rest of the walkers but I didn't know what to use. I slashed at the walkers who were closing in on me and then slipped my bow off, tucking it behind the double door's handles, locking it for now. The walkers pushed against the doors but my bow held them, I would have to replace it quickly, I didn't know how long it would last.

I was roughly shoved into the door from my side and I let out a groan of protest, the damn walker had a hold of my arm but the weight of its body straining against me quickly turned into dead weight and dropped to the floor.

"You're a damn fool, you know that," Daryl growled, appearing at my side. "You nearly got yourself killed." I could hear the fear clearly in his voice and I almost felt bad.

"I did what I had to do." I reasoned as I sliced the side of a corpse's face clean off, as its body fell I caught sight of a rotting pink flesh in its head, its brain probably. For some reason it sent a shudder through me.

"How many more would you say we have left?" I asked him, he was taller than me; he would be able to see how many there were better than I could.

"Maybe two dozen," he finished abruptly as he shoved the point of his arrow into an empty eye socket, ripped it out, and then rehomed it in an ear. He was good.

"Stop being so sexy when you kill walkers." I tried to sound annoyed but I think it came across more provocative than I wanted. He flashed a surprised wide eyed expression my way and I saw a little color tickle his cheeks. I made Daryl Dixon blush, hand me an award please.

"Damn it. Do you want to distract me and make me get bit or something," he muttered sulkily but I saw the way he looked at me after and that canceled out his remark. Like suddenly he saw in me what I had seen in him and the lustful light in his eyes informed me that he took pleasure in what he noticed.

I tried to ignore him after that, he was too much of a distraction and if I wanted to enjoy him later I had to kill these stupid walkers before they got us. Finally the wave of corpses lessened and turned to a stream then just a trickle. Not too soon either, my adrenaline rush ran out a while ago and I was exhausted. My arms felt like led, I could hardly lift them to defend myself, my reactions were slowly and I felt the need to catch my breath more often. But I couldn't let up, not until every single walker lay on the ground, lifeless for good.

With a wobbling swing of my machete I felled what used to be a woman, probably my age too, but I didn't have enough energy to think on it, let alone feel sad about it. As she dropped like a rock I realized that was the last one. The hall and aisles were littered with their bodies, and the stench was thick in the air but I didn't care. I heard my machete drop to the ground with a clatter and I collapsed back against the doors with a huge sigh. Daryl turned to look at me, his gaze was so soft I felt myself melt and without a second thought, not about what he would do, or what anyone would think I leaned towards him. I encircled him with my arms, pillowing my head on his chest, ignoring the blood that I smudged onto his shirt, or maybe it was the blood his shirt smeared on my face, it was already soaked in it.

He hesitated for a split second but then his arms hugged me close to him. I allowed my eyes to flutter shut and just breathed a moment, cherishing the thud of his heart under my ear, it was such a blessed sound, one I wouldn't trade for anything.

"We did it," I whispered hoarsely, my exhaustion taking away my voice.

"You did it." He corrected but I would never allow myself all the glory, I was not the kind to stand in the spotlight, that was not a place I enjoyed.

"We did it." I insisted and felt his chest shake gently with his snort. I gave a groan and released him; it took a little before he let me go too though which caused my heart to somersault in my chest.

"We still have work to do." I reminded him but he already knew. I looked over to see Rick and Carol talking and Maggie and Glenn embracing as if no one existed anymore but them. It was adorable and now, finally, I had a little piece of that for myself.

Daryl walked into an aisle and then returned holding a shelf. He replaced my bow holding the door shut with the shelf and I was so glad my bow seemed unharmed.

"Thanks," I sighed, accepting it from him.

"That was some quick thinking Jem, good job," Rick complimented striding over.

"Thanks Rick," I wearily said slipping the bow onto my back. Carol followed and she glanced between Daryl and I with an expression that bordered jealousy and I felt my heart go out to the poor woman. She lost her husband and her daughter to this outbreak, Daryl and her had grown close from what I had heard. I couldn't help but wonder if she had imagined up something happening between her and him, I couldn't blame her. After everything she went through, why wouldn't she want a man like Daryl, to help her feel more secure, safe, protected. I felt bad for her but I was glad he had decided he wanted me, I didn't know where I would be without him and I didn't want to think too long on that one. Of course a quick stream of thoughts filled my head anyway and decided most likely I might be dead or alone and bitter. But thanks to him I was part of a family, loved by them and him, and Hera and I were in a much better place.

"We should really do another sweep of this place." Rick admitted when Maggie and Glenn joined us. "The only problem with this store is its size but we need to be safe here. We can come back once we are rested up and deal with the remaining walkers."

"I agree," I felt like he needed someone to back him, especially now when everyone was exhausted and starting to question why we decided to stick around here. He needed to know that someone still favored him here and that it wasn't a waste.

I started off going back the way Maggie and I had gone earlier, searching for walkers but all I found were lifeless corpses. When I got to the garden center I pulled back the metal security gate and slowly opened the door, the last thing I needed to do was release more walkers into the store. But it was empty; I stepped out into the area, with its floor to ceiling fencing, padlocked gates, and the cover on the fence so you can't see in or out. It would be perfect for Hera, as long as I check the plants to make sure none were poisonous to her. Some were over grown, thriving on their own and taking over neighboring pots; others were choked out by their companions or didn't do so well without care from humans. Some grew down to the floor or were reaching up for the ceiling. It looked jungle like in some spots, I liked it.

Maybe tomorrow, if the snow wasn't too deep I could make a run with someone and gather her more grass hay. There would be plenty around here somewhere I was sure and I'm sure we could find some sort of contraption in the store that might be helpful. I could make this the perfect spot for Hera to live, it made me excited to have another secure spot for her. I moved over to the second garden center spot to find a smaller area, more geared to fertilizer and such, so I began clearing it of things I wouldn't want her to get in to. I figured she could stay in this one for now while I got the larger one ready and then maybe I could just open it up so that it was all one eventually. I was very ready to make this home and why not?

"For Hera?" I heard him ask, surprisingly he didn't scare me when he snuck up on me, maybe I was just too exhausted or maybe I was getting used to his silent way of moving around.

"Yes," I said, slapping my hands together to get the dirt and dust off as I finished. "I think I could get used to it here, definitely a lot of space to stretch out.

"Yeah," Daryl agreed as I moved closer to him, he watched me carefully with his sharp blue eyes and as I met his gaze they softened, something they really only did for me. I knew he could see that this was a good place but he was the type that didn't like to be caged in by four walls and I could be the same way. But we both knew a good thing when we saw it. I captured him in a hug again, he stiffened but I had a feeling he couldn't stop himself from doing that at first because he always relaxed under my touch after that. It was probably just a defense his body always put up before he remembered who it was.

"I'm so glad no one was hurt," I sighed, the relief I felt clear in my voice.

"I'm just glad you weren't killed, with that fool stunt you pulled." I could hear the protective edge in his voice, of course he wouldn't like the sacrifices I was willing to make and I didn't think he would.

"Well that fool stunt was worth it. It saved our ass's and I wouldn't change it. A little risk isn't always a bad thing." I reminded him. "Besides, I am not the type to just sit on the sideline and let someone else do stuff. If I see an opportunity, I will take it, that is just something you will have to get used to." I couldn't help but tell him that too. He let out a little growl but the glimmer in his eyes of admiration blew me away, of course I didn't let him see that though.

"I'll never get used to you putting yourself into danger and I will never stop being ready to save your ass when you do." He retorted causing me to smile.

"Good because I never said I would think things through when I take the opportunities," I laughed and he cracked a smile.

"But damn, you are a little warrior aren't you," his voice grew low and that lustful look from earlier clouded his eyes.

"Hell yes." I barely got the words out before his lips crashed into my own. It was a kiss with more passion then we have had yet and it filled me to the brim. But I couldn't keep up, I was ready to collapses and sleep forever, or at least the thought of doing that was nice. I did my best to kiss him back with everything I had and when we broke apart our eyes shone but they also gave away just how tired we both were.

"We should finish up getting this place ready and then you ought to rest," he decided.

"You too," I weakly retorted but sleep sounded so enticing, I could hardly fight it off as we spoke. "Let's get this done."

(Thanks for reading, please review and make my day! Like seriously, I LOVE reading reviews, so if you could just leave me a comment you will be my new best friend :) haha! Although, to be honest I have no clue when I'll be getting the next out, I got kittens and they are keeping me busy! So an adorable distraction all the same. So bear with me, thanks guys!)


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